Told Ya

Inside sources are spilling the beans about the truth behind Joaquin Phoenix's big career change from acting to music. Basically, the whole thing is a joke (as I believe I told everyone from almost the very start). "It's a put-on," revealed a Phoenix insider. "[Phoenix said] 'I'm going to pretend to have a meltdown and change careers, and Casey [Affleck] is going to film it.'" Like I said before, Joaquin is clearly bored with M. Night Shyamalan movies and crappy things about firefighters and is looking for something a little more interesting, a little more hip and meta. I'm certain this whole thing will be a reality show or a documentary and Joaquin will go around explaining the whole thing and making everyone think he's really clever and deep. Of course, there's always the chance Joaquin will become so immersed in the "character" he's playing that he won't be able to get back out of it, and will actually begin believing he is Joaquin the bad rapper and not Joaquin the bored actor. That's when the lobodomist steps in.

I Vote "It's A Big Joke"

Joaquin Phoenix had everyone scratching their heads after throwing an apparent fit before an appearance in Vegas Friday night. According to Page 6, the newly-minted rapper was getting ready for soundcheck but got pissed when his personal documentarian Casey Affleck and his camera crew didn't show up on time. "Thanks for being late and fucking everything up," Joaquin reportedly exclaimed before storming out. Then, per an eyewitness, "He came back five minutes later and did the soundcheck. Nobody can tell if he is for real or if this is all a big joke." I still say joke. But it's possible Joaquin has really just lost his mind.

This Is What He Meant By A Music Career?

For some reason, when Joaquin Phoenix said he was embarking on a music career, I pictured him strumming a guitar and crooning about fire and rain like some wannabe James Taylor. I did not see him trying to become a cross between Kanye West and the Unabomber. I've become convinced that the whole thing is some kind of put-on. Ben Affleck's brother Casey is apparently filming Joaquin's antics for a documentary, which seems like a hint. I guess Joaquin got bored starring in movies about fire fighters and wanted to become the new Ashton Kutcher. We all need a dream.