Showing posts with label Sunshine Tutt. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Sunshine Tutt. Show all posts

Friday, September 26, 2008

Owned


Chris Kattan
will have to give up a "low-six figure sum" as part of his settlement with Sunshine Tutt, the model he was married to for exactly 59 days. TMZ says Tutt was set to receive less than $10,000 per the original prenup but this was renegotiated upward. Yeah? What was that negotiation like? "My client would like to inform Mr. Kattan that she took pictures of his pathetic little penis while he was asleep and is prepared to release these to the public unless her demands are met." What kind of fucking putz allows himself to be owned like this? If Kattan had a pair he would've bumped off Sunshine himself or hired someone to do it. Even a hitman doesn't cost $100,000 (if you have a coupon or take advantage of a "Kill your ex, get one relative free" deal).

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Kattan Tutt Kaput


Chris Kattan
has reportedly separated from his wife Sunshine Tutt. The two got married just eight weeks ago. The stuff he slipped her finally wore off. Honestly, why else would a pretty girl like that marry a monkey-ass fucker like Kattan? Cause he makes her laugh? Clownish guys like that are always consumed with rage underneath and their antics finally reveal themselves to be the coping strategies of troubled, socially inept individuals. Andy Dick anyone?

Saturday, June 28, 2008

Chris Kattan is Getting Married. To a Woman. One With Boobs and Everything.


Former SNL-er Chris Kattan is getting married on Saturday to model Sunshine Tutt. No, that's not a joke...her name is really Sunshine Tutt.

Sunshine's parents missed a great opportunity. They should've named her King...then she could've spent the rest of her life claiming Steve Martin wrote a song about her.

You may have forgotten about Kattan, so I'll refresh your memory: He played lovable characters on SNL like the monkey dude whose whole bit was molesting famous actresses, then he tried acting in movies but they all sucked. Then Andy Dick became famous for basically doing the same thing Kattan did, and he had no choice but to fade into obscurity. And now he's not gay anymore apparently...or maybe he and Sunshine have a really weird relationship.