Things Crabbie is sick of: photoshoots where dimbulb celebs of the present pose as iconic cultural figures of the past. Jessica Alba as Charlie Chaplin? Are you kidding me? What the fuck is next? Paris Hilton as Buster Keaton? Kim Kardashian as Harold Lloyd? Britney Spears as Fatty Arbuckle?
Ok...Britney as Arbuckle would be pretty funny. But come on. Alba as Chaplin? What an insult to Chaplin. A God of the cinema portrayed by a two-bit hussy who could get acted off the screen by a turnip. Chaplin wouldn't have let her shine his shoes, much less be in a movie with him. He would've fucked her of course...but no way would he have acted with her.
