Contrary to popular belief, I did not have a fling with Boy George back in the eighties. Boy George was a heroin addict back then, and I always had a strict policy against sleeping with heroin addicts. Plus I thought he was a wanker. And that cross-dressing Japanese Rastafarian look wasn't doing anything for me either. Now he's going around with what looks like a Star-of-David shaved into the top of his dome. What the hell's that about? Maybe he thinks he's being daring and subversive.
By the way, sweeping streets for community service is not fun. I had to do that one time after a run-in with some Hasidic guys over in Brooklyn (okay, I admit, I was bombed out of my mind). No less than three old flings came by to throw garbage in my path, then take pictures while I swept it up. It was humiliating. But I did learn my lesson about getting wasted and shouting insults at Hasidic guys. Much like doing tequila shots with Mel Gibson, it may look like fun at first, but afterword you'll regret it.
