Phone company T-Mobile has decided to drop raven-haired seductress Catherine Zeta-Jones as its official pitchwoman.According to T-Mobile, the company is looking for more of a "down-to-earth" persona to represent the company. I think they just dumped her cause she's old and losing her looks, but what do I know?
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Crazed ex-model Janice Dickinson has set her amorous sights on grouchy American Idol judge Simon Cowell.Loopy cokehead Dickinson, a seventies fashion icon who's seen something of a resurrection as a reality-TV harpy, says the acerbic Cowell is, "the sexiest man on TV," and that she wants to challenge him to a "fuck-off" (I guess that's like a bake-off except there's fucking). No response yet from Cowell, but I've got a sneaking hunch he's not interested in Janice - or anyone else with a vagina.
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Things are getting even crazier in Anna Nicole Smith's life. First it was that whole unfortunate deal with her son, you know the dying and stuff, and now it appears there's going to be a battle between two different creeps over who is the father of Smith's new baby.On TV the other night, some shady lawyer called Howard K. Stern (that K. is there so we won't confuse him with the boner-nosed Jew radio prick) claimed to be the man responsible for bringing little Dannilynn Smith into the world. Now, a photojournalist named Larry Birkhead is claiming that he and not Stern is the real father, and he's demanding a paternity test to settle the matter.
Somebody call Maury Povich!
Wouldn't it be just deliciously ironic if both Stern and Birkhead turned out to be a pair of lying creeps who are just trying to make a buck off their association with Smith? I mean, considering Smith's own history of blatant gold-digging?
