Forget The Not-Gay Rumors

Not-gay rumors have been swirling around Lance Bass. Pictures like this will make those go away fast. (The chick is his dance partner on Dancing With the Losers Who Can't Get Work Anywhere Else Except Maybe a Rehab Show on VH1 or Perhaps a Holiday Inn Somewhere in Central Missouri.)

Give it Up Hon

Jamie-Lynn Sigler apparently didn't get the memo on Lance Bass. I hope he let her down easy. Gee, what's Jamie-Lynn been up to since The Sopranos went off? The same thing Lance has been up to since 'N Sync went away - nothing.

Gayest...Killer...Ever

It's not Jason from Friday the 13th, it's Lance Bass! Oh, you had us so fooled there for a second Lance. We actually thought you were a masked killer who rose from the depths of Crystal Lake to terrorize unsuspecting horny teenagers.

Actually, Lance enjoys terrorizing unsuspecting horny teenagers - by offering them butt-sex. "Butt-sex! Butt-sex here! Rapidly-aging former boy-bander looking for butt-sex!"