Brandon Davis Attacks Pink...'s Car

Some people are just flat out destructive. Like Brandon Davis. Everywhere he goes this guy spreads mayhem. He was leaving a liquor store next to The Viper Room the other night and the paps were bugging him and he tried to back up his Mercedes and wound up plowing into Pink's BMW. Pink came out and traded insurance information with Davis. They didn't have sex. Pink has better taste than that. I did sort of expect her to drive something cooler than a BMW though. The female Billy Idol should be rolling around on a Hog or something, right?

Relief at the Kabbalah Center

Fake musician Pink has chosen Scientology as her fad pseudo-religion. "Pink is in the beginning stages of checking out the religion, but she has taken to it and she wants to get more involved," a source said. Pink has apparently turned to Scientology to help her get over her split from Carey Hart. Oh Jesus Pink - just go on a little bender and get on with your life. Fuck, what is with all these asses and their turning to religion to get over things? "Oh I'm so broken up because my marriage failed. I need to comfort myself by spending thousands of dollars on a bunch of books dreamed up by a maniac science-fiction hack who was high on mushrooms. Cause the books dreamed up 2000 years ago by a bunch of goat-humping maniacs on mushrooms aren't cool enough for me." Such self-importance.

Pickled Pink Picks A Pair Of Pretty Pumpkins

"I should go to rehab. No...get arrested for DUI. Or, I know, adopt an orphan. Nah I hate kids. Only husbands should suck bottles and cry for hours on end while reeking of their own excrement..."