Don't Get Our Hopes Up...

Pete Wentz has grown so tired of media scrutiny that he sometimes thinks of packing up his woman and his kid and leaving the spotlight behind. "Sometimes I think Ashlee and I should do Newlyweds 2, take that fuck-you money and move to an island somewhere. Just disappear," said Wentz. But of course he'll never do it because he's a media-whore just like his buddy John Mayer. Even if he did move to an island (don't bring Jessica or her fat ass will sink the boat), he'd probably have cameras set up all over the place so he could stream video and pictures of himself back to Harvey Levin at TMZ. Harvey loves Pete's pictures. Especially the ones where Pete and Mayer are sucking each other off. You don't think they exist?

Hateability

Alec Baldwin has been on a crusade against Harvey Levin and TMZ ever since the site put out his infamous hate-filled voice mail rant against his innocent little pig of a daughter. Baldwin has now used his new book A Promise to Ourselves to further his anti-Levin campaign. Baldwin raves:

[Levin] seemed to be that breed of tabloid creature that realized an almost sexual level of pleasure from ruining other people's lives.

He has created TMZ as the updated receptacle of ... trash. He leads a cadre of self-satisfied twentysomethings who jump like rats from public relations sinking ship to sinking ship.

This book is apparently an attack on the family court system in America, which Alec believes hasn't given him a fair shake. I think he should absolutely get full custody of little Ireland - so he can scream his head off at her all the time instead of just on weekends.

What The Hell's All This Larry Birkhead/Howard K. Stern/Rita Cosby Crap?

I was only half-way paying attention to all that shit about Rita Cosby claiming Larry Birkhead and Howard K. Stern were gay lovers - then all of a sudden Larry Birkhead was on Larry King getting all up in Rita Cosby's face (with that poodle Harvey Levin sitting in for Larry), and Rita was on Bill O'Reilly making more wacky accusations, and everybody and their mother was acting like this was the story of the century or something. Now, it looks like Larry Birkhead plans on suing Rita for defamation. This might have less to do with the gay-sex allegation than some other crap Rita said about Larry and Howard being in cahoots all during the Dannielynn paternity battle - some stuff about Howard agreeing to give up the paternity fight if Larry would let him stay on as Anna Nicole's executor. All I know is that, when a fat whore's money is up for grabs, people will do some pretty sinister shit. Not that I would go as far as Rita Cosby in suggesting these guys were up to no good - I'm not a low-rent journalistic creep like Cosby, just a jolly celeb blogger with an over-active imagination. I would never, for example, suggest that Howard K. Stern killed Anna Nicole's son Daniel on purpose to get him out of the way. Nor would I suggest that Howard and Larry conspired to do away with Anna and then worked out how to split up the money. Nor would I claim that, even as we speak, Howard and Larry are holed up in some fleabag someplace taking turns fisting each other in the ass. I'm not that kind of person.

TMZ TV Already In Trouble?

There's trouble a-brewin' at TMZ. The gossip website, which has become a top destination for celeb watchers despite its shoddy journalism, is set to launch a new TV venture at the beginning of September - but, reportedly, preparations for this new show are not as far along as they should be, which is causing a lot of tension. Of course, in the world of heartless executives, the answer to any sort of problem is firing someone - hence the canning of TMZ TV's co-executive producer Bryn Friedman. No real reason has been given for why Friedman was let go - the only explanation Page 6 could come up with is that fellow execs Harvey Levin and Jim Paratore's fighting was placing the show in jeopardy, and someone decided that Bryn was a convenient person to blame for all the acrimony.

So there you go - two insecure males spar with each other, causing the show's preparations to be held up, and the solution is to fire the woman. Bryn Friedman is not taking the matter lying down however - she has reportedly contacted celebrity lawyer Marty Singer, with the intention of suing TMZ. Harvey Levin, aka Paris Hilton's new bitch now that Elliot Mintz is out of the picture, insists he has not been fighting with Paratore, and that TMZ TV is right on-schedule for a September 10th launch. Said Levin:

I don't know what you're talking about - the set is the [TMZ.com] newsroom and I love Jim, he's like my brother! And while I'm on the show, there is an ensemble cast. It is different than a traditional magazine show.

Different how, Harvey? In that there will be no pretense whatsoever to journalistic credibility? If the show's anything like your site, it is sure to be a trainwreck. Maybe you could spruce it up some by including a tour of your S&M dungeon. You know, the one where you take all the Filipino boys you're always buying. See? I can make up shit out of thin air too.

(source)

TMZ Is Paris Central

Anyone who's visited TMZ the last few months knows the site has become Paris Hilton's new official Internet publicity arm. And if you saw Harvey Levin on TV during Paris's time in jail you know that the TMZ editor-in-chief has become her personal bitch. How did this happen though? Did Levin wake up one morning, roll his fourteen-year-old Filipino sex-slave aside and just decide to go pro-Paris? I would tend to doubt it. Usually, when someone starts demonstrating such a glaring bias, there's a good reason. According to Rush & Molloy, TMZ's good reason includes being fed exclusives by Paris's mom Kathy. But the quid pro quo doesn't end with Paris's positive coverage on the site. TMZ has also reportedly given a researcher job to Jan Heger, the daughter of Paris's DUI lawyer Richard Hutton. So now we know where TMZ got a lot of its inside-info - straight from Hutton in exchange for a job for his daughter. Not only is TMZ journalistically sloppy, it is completely without ethics. But if you're trying to build a big site to compete with the other entertainment outlets you need to cultivate sources and gain inside access. These things matter more than credibility or character. Harvey Levin sold what little soul he had to Kathy Hilton and Richard Hutton - and now Paris Hilton's people have a new channel by which they can disseminate their spin.

(source)