If you can make it through the whole 3 hour "Scientology Summit" put up on The Pirate Bay today, then you deserve some kind of prize. I made it through exactly 51 minutes before shutting it off. If I want to watch 3 hours of infomercial, I'll just throw on Bravo at 1 in the morning. At least then I might find out about a new salad tosser or something that slices, dices and makes julien fries.
David Miscavige, ladies and gentleman, is not the leader of a cult - he is a book salesman. He stands at a podium in this video, droning on and on about how the original L. Ron Hubbard Scientology/Dianetics books were full of errors, omissions and other stuff never intended by the author, and how all this has been corrected now by going back to Hubbard's original notes and lectures. Miscavige then has the audacity to say that the new books resulting from all this work are not just a "re-packaging" of the old books. In other words...Miscavige insists to the assembled Scientology drones (and they are drones) that they are not merely being sold rearranged versions of the shit they already bought and read. He tells them that these new books are essential to their understanding of Scientology and if they read them they will know more than Scientologists of past years ever knew.
I'm telling you, this fucker could sell ice cubes to Eskimos - if the Eskimos were rich, stupid and totally brainwashed.
Like I said, it's an infomercial. Of course, Miscavige's interminable, asinine "lecture" is interspersed with all sorts of cool graphics showing the shiny new books, and the lecture CDs and all the other accompanying material. Miscavige isn't even subtle about it. At one point he even gushes about the typeface, and how computers were used to devise the most comprehensive of glossaries for each book. Wow. Glossaries! Indexes! Pretty typefaces! Yes, and if I have all this, I will understand the mysteries of the universe!
And the sad thing? The idiot crowd keeps standing up and applauding. I swear to God, they applauded the typeface! Shitburgers are too dumb to see that their leader is nothing but a cheap hawker of dull quasi-literature! That L. Ron Hubbard was nothing but a science-fiction hack who started out trying to re-invent psychology, then got carried away with his crazy train-of-thought, and wound up inventing a bunch of meaninglessly arcane terminology in a weak attempt at making his painfully obvious observations sound profound. It's freaking gibberish!
Pathetic. And not terrifying at all. Mind-numbingly boring really. And silly and two-bit. The sort of shit only a mental midget like Tom Cruise could ever possibly embrace.
Poor Tom - the sad thing isn't that he's insane, it's that his insanity has chosen to coalesce around something so inane. It's like being out of your skull over the lyrics to a dopey rock song, or obsessed with some movie everyone else sees is hopelessly dumb. I just feel sorry for Cruise now and the rest of them. I hope someday they wake up and realize they've been duped, but I doubt they will.
