Jennifer Lopez had a harder time finishing that triathlon than her publicity people want us to believe. Reportedly, J-Ho was just about done with the swimming section when a riptide or something she had for lunch started dragging her under...and bitch almost drowned! Yeah, but then her heroic trainer pulled her sorry ass back up. What a story that would've been, huh? Jennifer Lopez Survives Diddy, Dies Like Confused Sea Lion. I guess God wasn't feeling frisky enough this weekend.
