Saturday, January 10, 2009

Not Fat Enough (Also Her Twat Smells)


I've heard of actresses losing roles because they were too old and fat but I've seldom heard of one losing a role because she wasn't old and fat enough. This is exactly what's happened to Sienna Miller, however. Page 6 says Miller was dumped from the new Russell Crowe flick Nottingham because Crowe is a gigantic blubbery moose and producers were worried his love scenes with the young, slim Sienna, who was set to play Maid Marian to Crowe's Robin Hood, would just ick everyone out. The film is now casting around for a fattish actress in her late '30s or early '40s who will be more compatible with the gargantuan, sweaty, heart-attack-waiting-to-happen Crowe (who, by the way, will also be playing the Sheriff of Nottingham). I'm guessing this is one part Sienna doesn't mind losing - unless she was really looking forward to being squashed beneath a giant bag of pink Aussie flesh.