This Could Be Anything

Wrestling match? Rough sex? Delirium brought on by ingestion of salt water?

At Least It Ain't Owen Wilson Again

Kate Hudson has a new man and by "new" I mean "not Owen Wilson." The guy's name is Adam Scott and he's described as an Australian golfing star. And now he's sticking it to a movie star no one can ever remember making a good movie. Congrats to him.

Rainy Day Owen

"Wow man, I'm like, surrounded by billions of tiny glowing particles. I feel so at peace with myself right now. Like nothing in the universe can bother me. I think I've discovered bliss dudes. Oh wait...no, I just took a bunch of pills to kill myself and this is the crazy drug-induced dream I'm having. Well fuck man. That just totally blows..."

Sad Man's Best Friend

Owen Wilson has at last found a truly faithful companion, one who will stay with him through thick and thin, who will never judge him, who doesn't care if he's a sad pathetic wretch who sometimes slashes his wrists and takes too many pills and passes out in puddles of his bodily fluids. That is his dog right?

Teaser for Marley & Me

Here's the first teaser for the Jennifer Aniston-Owen Wilson comedy Marley & Me. Is the dog somehow possessed by the spirit of Bob Marley? I don't know. The teaser is lame. Chariots of Fire? Nice current reference there. It was either that or a goof on True Heart Susie. There were innumerable pics a few weeks back of Aniston and Wilson chasing that dog around on that beach - now we know what it was about. And this is Aniston's big Christmas vehicle? And we wonder why Jolie is kicking her ass at the box office.

Photographic Evidence of Lance Armstrong and Kate Hudson's Relationship

There you go...Kate Hudson and Lance Armstrong are a couple. Owen Wilson is, even as we speak, reaching for the rat poison.

Don't do it Owen! You have so much to live for! There are tons of chicks you haven't banged yet!

Kate Hudson and Lance Armstrong

Now we know why Kate Hudson broke up with Owen Wilson...she was too busy shagging Lance Armstrong.

Armstrong, who was last linked with Ashley Olsen aka The Almost-Normal One, reportedly had dinner with Hudson Friday and Saturday night in Austin. The second night they ate at the Hula Hut with an entire entourage in tow.

"They came in with the kids and a large group of people," says a source. "They ordered dinner – tacos, burgers and fries and that sort of stuff."

Pictures have yet to surface of Hudson and Armstrong together...but I hope that when they do the police will have the good sense to close off any bridges near Owen Wilson.

Kate Hudson and Owen Wilson Break Up. Wait...They Were Together?

Kate Hudson and Owen Wilson have apparently broken up again. This news stunned me...because I hadn't realized they were actually together.

Clearly, these two are each other's crack. They want to get clean but they just can't stop going back for more. Unfortunately, every time their relationship goes bad, Owen ends up a babbling wreck with a bottle of pills in one hand and a dull razor in the other.

Hopefully this time Owen will be able to just let her go. I mean, honestly...is she that hot? I guess her booty is pretty tight...but come on. It's only a booty. Plenty of that walking around.

Kate Hudson's Hair is Blue

Owen Wilson squirts blue slushy-syrup from his dick.

Getting Flirtier

Jennifer Aniston and Owen Wilson have reportedly been getting flirty on the set of their new movie Marley & Me. This looks like more than flirtiness to me though. I'm convinced now that they've been fucking. And I think Owen has been fucking Kate Hudson again too. He's not happy unless he's balling at least two chicks at once. Preferrably three.

A-Lister Set to Be Outed by U.S. Mag?

Rav Singh writes in his blog at News of the World:

AN A-lister star of Hollywood will be outed next week, I can reveal.

This particular actor is known as a bit of a ladies man but in fact, he really has a secret eye for the fellas.

My man in LA told me: "This guy is not married. He's been out with many women but has been seeing men too.

"A US mag is revealing it next week which will send Hollywood into overdrive."

Now we're all guessing who it is. A lot of people are saying George Clooney but I say no way...Clooney ain't gay. More people are saying Owen Wilson but I also don't believe Wilson is gay.

I'm just on the edge of my seat, I don't know about you...

Someone Hasn't Been Sleeping Enough...

Why does Jennifer Aniston look so tired on the set of Marley and Me?

A. Owen Wilson has been fucking her all night long.
B. All that crying eventually takes its toll.
C. She's been wearing out her new nuclear-powered, space-aged super-vibrator.
D. It's hard work being a bitch.
E. Hating Angelina is a 24/7 job, and Jen is incredibly dedicated.

Owen Wilson and Jennifer Aniston - Is Something Cooking?

Owen Wilson and Jennifer Aniston, the two most depressing people on earth, are reportedly getting "flirty" with each other on the set of their new movie.

"The hugging didn't end when the cameras stopped rolling," a crew member told Star magazine.

"They were very flirty together, far more than you would expect. In between takes they were hanging onto each other. They are very friendly."

Ugh, God...stop.

Those boots make her legs look fat.

Is he going bald?

Jennifer and Owen apparently became buddies last October after Jen helped Owen crawl of out his suicidal funk by sending him a copy of The Power of Now. And now, Owen is returning the favor by helping Jen loosen up on the set.

"Jen is known for being a recluse on set," she source said. "But she's having so much fun hanging out with Owen. She's just really relaxed and happy, which is nice to see."

Jen's happy...well that has to stop. Someone needs to swoop in down there to Miami and make her miserable again. And I know just the person...

Jennifer Aniston and Owen Wilson Shoot on the Beach

I wish the headline for this one were "Jennifer Aniston and Owen Wilson Shoot-Up on the Beach," cause that would be way more interesting than just the two of them standing there looking vaguely uncomfortable as they go through their scene.

The movie, by the way, is called Marley and Me. Here's the IMDb synopsis:

A family learns important life lessons from their adorable, but naughty and neurotic dog. Based on the memoir by John Grogan.

Uh, yeah...that sounds great. Wow. Sign me up for that.

Owen Wilson Is Doing A Movie With Jennifer Aniston

Owen Wilson is jumping back into the movie game. His next project will be called Marley & Me (awful), and it will co-star none other than Jennifer Aniston.

The film is set to begin shooting in Miami. Hardy Hill from something called The Opium Group expressed his excitement at having Owen in town.

"Miami loves when Owen is in town and we are all happy to see him back at work in our city," Hill said. "Owen attracted lots of attention when he was here last, and having a bit of Hollywood in South Florida is always great. We hope to see his face at some of our venues."

I don't know who this Hardy Hill guy is or why he's got such a hard-on for Owen Wilson, but I hope Owen stays away from him. The Opium Group? That sounds like something Owen really needs to be associating with at this time in his life.

And another person he needs to minimize his contact with...Jennifer Aniston. I mean, come on - isn't Owen's life sad enough? Dude tried to commit suicide for gosh sakes. And now he's going to be exposed to the single-most-depressing individual on the face of the earth?

I hope Owen knows what he's getting into.

(source)

Owen And Woody Are Pals

Owen Wilson is hanging out with Woody Harrelson. In Peru.

The fast way of killing himself didn't work, so Owen's going with the slow way.

Seriously, where the hell is Owen's support group? Why not just hand Owen a big pile of drugs and a gun and a picture of Kate Hudson kissing whatever dope she's been kissing lately? Or give him a gift certificate from a mall in Omaha? Or just push him the fuck in front of a bus?

Wilson Bags Bionic Babe

The game of musical chairs that is Owen Wilson's sex-life has landed on a new piece of semi-famous tail: Michelle Ryan, star of NBC's failed revival of The Bionic Woman.

Reports say Owen and Michelle have been spending a lot of time together lately, dining at Nobu and body-boarding at Malibu beaches. A source explains Owen's interest:

Michelle’s one of the few women in Hollywood who looks like herself and hasn’t had loads of work done. She’s refreshingly natural. She’s also pretty innocent about how this whole town works, which Owen finds endearing. And then there’s that British sense of humour.

In other words Michelle is young and basically unspoiled, and now she's going out with Owen Wilson which means that, within a month, she'll be broke and strung out and just trying to find someone to buy her a plane ticket back to England.

Funny how Owen keeps roping in all these attractive young women, isn't it? Jessica Simpson. Le Call. Now Michelle Ryan. The whole "I tried to kill myself not long ago, but I'm okay now" line must be working out great for him. Wouldn't surprise me one bit to find out Owen faked the whole suicide thing just so he could play the whole poor, sensitive, suffering man thing with broads he was trying to nail. Women eat that shit up I'm told.

(source)

Owen Wilson Has A New Woman

Was anyone here aware that Owen Wilson had been seen going around with a mystery woman lately? I wasn't. Anyway, the mystery woman no one knew about has now been positively identified as a model named Le Call, and an inside source has confirmed that she is indeed dating Owen.

Unfortunately, being the girlfriend of a famous suicidal wreck isn't all daisies and marshmallows and trips to the ER at four in the morning. It can be stressful finding oneself the object of sudden media attention. Le Call - apparently you have to say the whole thing together - is reportedly not enjoying all the press. A source said:

Le Call is totally overwhelmed by all of this attention. She isn't used to it. So they will be leaving town tomorrow to escape – and traveling a great distance.

I wonder where Le Call will be going to get away from the press? Will Le Call end up in Paris? Will Le Call find herself in Moscow? Will Le Call jet off to Shanghai, buy some bright red lipstick and offer sucky-sucky to Belgian tourists at the airport? I don't know what Le Call will do. But I do know one thing - I'm glad Owen's not hosing Jessica Simpson.

(source)

Kate Hudson And Heath Ledger?

Kate Hudson and Heath Ledger were seen making out at the Beatrice Inn Thursday night according to Page 6's vaunted spies. A rep for Hudson denies the report however, saying:

This is absolutely untrue. They ran into each other and chatted briefly, but that was the extent of it.

Why the sudden modesty Kate? You had no problem sucking face with Dax Shepard in the middle of a supermarket, but now you're shooting down rumors that you played tonsil hockey with Heath Ledger? I should think you'd be happy to be linked with Ledger - he's certainly a step up from Dax and Dane Cook and whatever other hunks of Grade A doofus you've been rumored to be with lately.

You wouldn't be experiencing a sudden attack of remorse, would you Kate? Over the fact that poor Owen is still suffering while you're out there acting like a liquored up college freshman on her first trip to Mardi Gras? Think how out of his mind with despair Owen must be Kate - he's shacking up with Jessica Simpson for Christ's sake. If that isn't a cry for help, I don't know what is.

(source)

Owen Wilson - So Pretty

Born free...free as the wind...