Paul McCartney has been in Antigua with his biped girlfriend Nancy Shevell. He's down there decompressing after the drawn-out insanity of the Heather Mills divorce proceedings which led to him having to cough up around $50 million.
Naturally, Heather saw these pics of Paul looking happy and it caused her to go off the deep end. Heather reportedly thinks Paul is "flaunting" his new girlfriend in front of her.
Of course, if anyone in the world does anything, it must in some way have something to do with Heather Mills. If a bear shits in the woods, it did so because Heather either does or doesn't like bears shitting in woods.
It is natural for Heather to be resentful of Ms. Shevell...for a multitude of reasons which I shall now list:
- Shevell is a young-looking 47, while Heather is an old, beat-up-looking 40.
- Shevell can get to the bathroom in the middle of the night without having to crawl on her belly like a lizard or hop like a human pogo-stick.
- Shevell is a successful woman in her own right (she's an executive with the New York Metropolitan Transportation Authority), while Heather has only ever made money by cheesing off men or literally whoring herself out.
- Shevell doesn't have to apply Armor All to her leg after washing it.
- Shevell is liked and admired by people in her circle, while Heather is hated and despised even by people who claim to be her friends.
- Shevell doesn't have to worry about dogs taking a leak on her leg if she stands still on the sidewalk for a few seconds.
- Shevell is attractive, whereas Heather has big ugly sagging freak-boobs and a face that looks like it was pounded with a meat-hammer.
- Shevell can play soccer without her leg being in danger of becoming a hazardous projectile.
