Ozzy and Sharon Osbourne are hosting this year's Brit Awards, during which Ozzy is slated to present Paul McCartney with a lifetime achievement honor. Going by some stuff Sharon and Ozzy have said, it would probably be a bad idea for Paul's estranged wife Heather Mills to show up at the ceremony.
"I would boot her off," Sharon said of the prospect of Stumpy making an appearance. "I think she's a miserable old cow."
Ozzy chimed in as well, saying of Paul, "The body of work he's got is just unbelievable. But I really don't want to be there if Heather shows up. Never mind McCartney having a go - I think the audience will string her up.
"Sharon and I have met them both on a few occasions but if Paul doesn't know her, I'm fucked if I do. She's fucking nuts."
Hear that Stumpy? Ozzy Osbourne thinks you're nuts. This is a man who bites the heads off of live animals...
Hey, that gives me an idea - maybe Ozzy would like to bite Heather's head off!
Eh...it probably wouldn't kill her anyway. Heather's body would hop around with the neck-stump spurting blood, and her mouth would still be yapping away in Ozzy's stomach. She'd probably give an interview from Ozzy's digestive tract about how she's a victim and everyone's out to get her.
