People are actually talking about the Tony Awards this year. Unfortunately, they're only talking about them because one of the performers, Bret Michaels, got laid out by a piece of a set that was descending, leading to speculation that Michaels is even dumber than we ever suspected.
And what, in the name of all that's holy, was Bret Michaels doing at the Tonys in the first place? Yeah, I know it's only a dumb awards show, but still - it's the Tonys, the most dignified albeit irrelevant of the annual self-congratulatory galas. The only hilarious tomfoolery there should be a horribly forced Nathan Lane routine, not a washed-up hairbander getting decapitated by the stage. Maybe they've learned their lesson: if they wanna snazz up the Tonys, have Hugh Jackman do a number from Hair, butt-naked of course, while stroking his meat. No more overweight David Lee Roth wannabes phoning in '80s cock-rock anthems.
