Jessica Alba has become pregnant by boyfriend Cash Warren, report reps for the greasy-haired, borderline-retarded Fantastic 4 star. The baby is due in late spring/early summer, meaning we may now look forward to a good six months of pictures of Alba's belly getting bigger, Alba's face becoming more scowly, and Cash Warren waddling along beside her like some kind of miserable, sexually-frustrated valet.
By the way, for those who were wondering...I looked it up and, no, herpes is not in fact hereditary. So the baby will be okay, at least until it grows up and has sex with Derek Jeter.
(source)
