Winona "Sticky Fingers" Ryder is clearly living in the wrong country. If she really wants to get her shoplifting rocks off, she should move to England.
Apparently the English believe in being super-lenient when it comes to shoplifters. Just consider the case of Joanne Jones, who was recently let off with a 90-day suspended jail term after getting convicted of shoplifting and other petty crimes for the 175th time.
Not that Joanne hasn't been in jail...she's actually been locked up a total of 34 times over the last 16 years. But consider the percentages - 34 jail terms in 175 convictions? Not too bad.
Plus, those couldn't have been very long terms. The woman is only 31. I say Winona should take that deal. 12 trips to court per year (that's what Ms. Jones is averaging) is a small price to pay to be able to do what you love most.
The really funny thing about this story is what the magistrate said when handing down the sentence to Jones:
"We'll give you another chance. You are no stranger to this court.
"However on this occasion there's a chink of light in your favour, which gives us some chance of hope for you.
"We are going to give you another opportunity if you can manage it."
The "chink of light" the magistrate refers to was apparently Ms. Jones's willingness to admit to a theft that wasn't on her charge sheet. So, you see, she's learning to take responsibility for her actions, and therefore is worthy of another chance.This magistrate needs to be introduced to the concept of the sociopath. They "take responsibility" for things precisely because they know it will get them off the hook and they'll be able to do more bad stuff. Is that complicated?
