What would've been the smart thing for Lindsay Lohan to do in the wake of her latest DUI arrest? Keep her mouth shut. Well, this is Lindsay - of course she's not going to do the smart thing. It's barely been a day since she got busted for being wasted and chasing her ex-assistant in a car, and already she's spreading the bullshit, saying the following to Access Hollywood host Billy Bush in an email:
I am innocent... did not do drugs they’re not mine. I was almost hit by my assistant Tarin’s mom I appreciate everyone giving me my privacy.
Apparently being high on cocaine causes you to lose the ability to properly punctuate. Seriously though - this is such classic Lohan jive. She did not do drugs, they were not her drugs. They just happened to be in her pocket at the time she was hauled into the police station to be booked. Maybe the police were all hallucinating? Sorry Lindsay, but you just don't get it - from a legal stand-point it doesn't matter if you did the drugs. You had them in your pocket, therefore they were in your possession, therefore you are charged with possessing them. Furthermore, in the grand scheme, the drug possession charge is really not the serious one - the DUI is. People who do drugs endanger only themselves; people who get drunk and/or high and drive endanger others. Have you not processed that little fact yet? You put other people's lives in peril by driving while drunk. Are you going to dispute the .12 to .13 you blew on the Breathalyzer? Let me guess - it wasn't your breath. And as for your attempt to explain away whatever happened between you and your assistant as being her mother's fault - I'm sorry Lindz, but how does her mother almost running you over justify you then chasing them in a car while intoxicated? If your judgment was that seriously impaired, then you belong in jail, or rehab, or anywhere but behind the wheel of a car. See, that's the thing you're not getting - it's not about whether you were drunk or high, it's about the fact that you were drunk or high while driving. It doesn't matter why you got mad at them and decided to chase them - you were drunk while you were doing it. Is it getting through now, you maddeningly stupid bitch?
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