Christina Aguilera. Is she singing or passing a squash?
Carrie Underwood brings the backwoods to the Grammys. Show us those pretty teeth, Carrie. Huh-huh-huh.
Nelly Furtado, some British chick with big teeth and an ethnic-looking broad from The Pussycat Dolls.
Shakira shakes her thang.
Mary J. Blige gives a blubbering, Jesus-praising acceptance speech. I guess Jesus hates all the people who lost.
Beyonce sings.
