I've been sitting here all afternoon watching the saga of Balloon Boy play out on CNN. In case you missed it, a 6-year-old Colorado kid allegedly climbed into his storm-chasing parents' experimental helium balloon and floated away. America spent the next couple hours watching helicopter footage of the soaring balloon, until it finally landed in a field.That was when we discovered that Balloon Boy was not in the balloon.
Either Balloon Boy fell out at some point during the flight, or he was never in the balloon in the first place.
So, millions of people wasted a whole afternoon watching footage of an empty balloon flying over Colorado.
As of this writing, the Balloon Boy story remains unresolved. It's possible he did fly off in the balloon and fall out, in which case, he is dead. It's also possible the whole thing was a hoax cooked up by his publicity-hungry parents, who once appeared on the reality show Wife Swap.
In which case, we need to find those fuckers and burn them alive.
Follow the further unfolding of the Balloon Boy saga via Crabbie's Twitter.
