Maggie Gyllenhaal's Lesbo Strike Statement

This video of Maggie Gyllenhaal and some other chicks acting all lesbo was apparently made in support of the striking writers. The premise is that these broads have all been invited to the same apartment by a guy who symbolizes the producers but he stands them up, so they decide they don't need producers and just...well, whatever. The video is telling us that the producers are sleazy and actresses are all sluts who will fuck anyone, I guess. Maggie looks slightly sexier than usual but that could just be the black and white or maybe I'm bleary-eyed from lack of sleep.

(thanks bulldog)

Okay, So, Maybe Britney Really Is Crazy

Britney Spears has reportedly been designated G.D. by the mental health professionals there at UCLA Medical Center. G.D. stands for "greatly disabled," which basically means that if someone isn't there to do stuff for Britney, she will wind up caked in her own filth and starving to death.

So apparently Britney isn't faking like I insisted and really is crazy. Well we all make mistakes.

Britney is said to be suffering a severe manic episode. It got so bad that, at one point, she started screaming that her mother was having sex with her boyfriend. Then she insisted that the only reason her mom wanted her committed was because she wants to sleep with her boyfriend some more.

It's not yet known who exactly Britney is referring to when she mentions her "boyfriend." She doesn't think Lynne is fucking Adnan Ghalib, I don't imagine...

My God, you don't think this could all be some crazy flashback. You know, to some horrible thing that happened in Britney's past. Like maybe she walked in on Lynne and Justin Timberlake...

Oh my God - I just threw up in my mouth.

(source)

Celebs Bullied ET Into Pulling Heath Ledger Drug Video

Entertainment Tonight was set to run a video that showed the late Heath Ledger bombed out of his mind on drugs at a party. But numerous celebrities and their agents and publicists, upon hearing news of this, came down hard on Entertainment Tonight, and convinced the tabloid show not to air the video after all.

Question: Where are all these concerned celebs every time some new piece of Britney video is about to break? I'll tell you where they are...having orgies.

ET had no choice but to bow to Hollywood pressure. That show depends on having access to stars, so if a bunch of publicists and agents get together and start lodging protests, threatening not to give you interviews with their clients - well, you pretty much have to cave in.

Of course, you could argue that ET never should've wanted to show the video in the first place. I myself would have reservations about running it on this site, and I'll say or show just about anything on here. What the hell do I care? I've got 9 readers. What's anyone gonna do? Sue me? For what? My lint collection? They gonna shut down my site? Fuck them. I'll just find some other way to waste my time.

I'm very glad sometimes not to be part of the great MSM suck-off. Although I wouldn't mind having their money.

(source)

Michael Jackson's Kids Will Haunt My Nightmares Forever

Michael Jackson let his kids Paris and Prince Michael take their masks off while they were in Vegas.

Michael - put the damn masks back on those kids!

To those of you who think Dirty Disher never makes fun of kids, I quote, "The boy looks like a 40-year-old serial killer." She said that to me earlier. She will deny it, but whatever.

Michael of course left his own mask on. That's because he has no face.

Depardieu Ogles Loren

Gerard Depardieu is Mr. Subtle. "Madame, I do believe I have a non-pharmaceutically-induced erection." But he said it in French so it sounded elegant.

Star Trek Orgasms

"Star Trek" and "orgasm" are not words that are normally found in such close proximity.

Daniel Smith Was Probably Murdered

A medical examiner has told an inquest that Anna Nicole Smith's son Daniel had to have died from an "intentional" overdose of methadone - but downplayed suicide as a possible explanation.

The quantity of methadone found in Smith's body indicated the ingestion of a large dose in a short time - something Dr. Lee Hern said, during testimony, was not consistent with the usual behavior of abusers.

"It's not common for people in recreational use to take large quantities all at once," Hern said. "In my study of drug abuse patients people don't take such a quantity of pills to get high. They take one or two and if the effects are not there they may take more."

Smith, according to Hern, showed no signs of methadone tolerance, meaning he was not a heavy user of the drug, and would therefore not have needed such a large dose to achieve the desired effect.

Hern all-but-discounted the possibility that Smith knowingly took the pills. To establish suicide, Hern said the case would need proof of "self destructive statements or suicidal thoughts heard by people that were close to [Smith]." There is no such evidence.

Hern then outlined how methadone could be dissolved in a liquid to mask its taste, meaning a person could take eight tablets - the number Smith is believed to have ingested - without even knowing it.

"So what we are left with is homicide," Hern flatly stated.

Howard K. Stern flushed methadone tablets down a toilet shortly after Smith's body was discovered.

(source)

Katie Holmes Straining Against The Leash?

A new report claims Katie Holmes is openly rebelling against Tom Cruise's dictatorial control of her existence. The Woman's Day magazine story says Katie is angry about the negative publicity the couple has garnered after the release of the famed Scientology videos, and about Tom making her do the movie Mad Money which completely tanked at the box office. So upset is Katie that she even reportedly stormed out of a "crisis meeting" Tom called for them.

I can see Katie being very mad at Tom. She only married him in the first place because she thought it would help her career, which wasn't the worst idea actually, given how much power and influence Tom had at that time. But, it's probably become clear to Katie by now that Tom's clout has waned. The best he could do for her was Mad Money? She got Batman even before coming under Tom's wing, but now she's even been booted from that gig. Her career has gone from promising to buried at the bottom of the trash heap...and being associated with all sorts of cultish insanity is not helping matters much. Katie had some fans before Tom, but has lost a lot of them since becoming his trophy wife, and every time more accounts of Tom's nuttiness are released, Katie loses even more.

Being Mrs. Tom Cruise is no picnic, what with the misogynistic little bastard breathing down your neck every second. Actually, in Tom's case, it's more like breathing down the back of your pants, but whatever...

(source)

Britney Spears Dragged Off To Looney Bin

Britney Spears was hauled, apparently not kicking and screaming, off to the nuthouse last night. Why this would happen when Britney clearly isn't really crazy is beyond me. Maybe she just wanted a little rest from her endless campaign of pretend-insanity, and figured a short voluntary stint at UCLA Medical Center would do.

Yes, Britney went of her own free will. TMZ reports that, after the live-in shrink put in their call to the authorities, Brit made hot chocolate and waited calmly for the paramedics. The shrink apparently made the call because Britney hadn't slept in a couple of days. I wasn't aware that she slept at all, but okay.

TMZ now says that, a few weeks ago, Britney signed papers indicating she wanted her parents kept out of any medical decisions. This stemmed from a shoving match between her father Jamie and Sam Lutfi. On the one hand, I think Britney showed sound judgment in not wanting her parents involved - since they're the ones who got her in this mess in the first place. But giving authority to Sam Lutfi to make decisions on her behalf shows the opposite of sound judgment - in fact, I wouldn't be surprised to learn Lutfi was even at this moment on his way to Brazil, having transferred all Britney's money into his own off-shore accounts.

Xenu's Biggest Fan

Nancy Cartwright is the biggest Scientologist in the world. Yes, the same Nancy Cartwright who has given voice to Bart Simpson for the last couple of decades. She reportedly gave $10 million to the church last year - the largest sum by any single individual.

Nancy reportedly outdonated even Tom Cruise, who gave only a paltry $5 million. And she completely blew the doors off John Travolta and Kelly Preston who gave $1 million each. In return for her generosity, Nancy was given the prestigious Patron Laureate Award.

I guess Nancy really, really wanted that Patron Laureate Award. I mean, 10 million bucks? Who knew someone who worked on The Simpsons even had that kind of money.

And how wonderful does it make you feel, Simpsons fans, to know that a part of the money you've spent on your love of the show has ended up being funneled into the Scientology coffers? Yup - if you went to see The Simpsons movie (which sucked), or if you've bought any of the DVD sets, or if you've helped the show's ratings by watching it, hence allowing the network to jack up their advertising rates and the actors to ask for more money...you've basically become a financial supporter of Scientology.

I guess now we know why, unlike South Park, The Simpsons never makes fun of Scientology or Tom Cruise. They're afraid Nancy will quit the show and they'll have to find another Bart. Of course, The Simpsons makes fun of Christianity all the time, and Judaism and Buddhism and pretty much every other religion. But they don't dare piss off the one Scientologist amongst them.

Scientologists are so open-minded and have such a wonderful sense of humor about themselves.

(source)

Sally Field Chews Out SAG President, Frightens Sandra Oh

Sally Field aka Norma Rae reportedly went on a rampage during the recent SAG Awards. Field, angry over SAG's tardiness in beginning negotiations with the studios, allegedly got up in the face of president Alan Rosenberg, then continued her assault in various other locations.

"She cornered Alan and heatedly told him off," a witness said. "Then, she proceeded to lobby other actors on her way out of the tent, where she berated a Spanish news correspondent in front of Sandra Oh. Then, not yet satisfied by the commotion she was causing, she trapped Alison Janney on the curb as they were waiting in line for their limos."

Sally, girlfriend - Norma Rae was 30 years ago. Don't you think it's time you got out of character?

Sally's rep is denying the whole thing of course.

"She was sitting next to Alan at the table and wanted to talk to him," says the rep. "She didn't corner him. She thought talks should have begun sooner and was trying to relay information from other actors that contract negotiations should begin sooner rather than later, and he became incensed. She had to raise her voice to be heard over his. She has every right to express her opinion to him."

Yeah, but does she have to make the poor guy wet his pants? I mean, that's The Flying Nun for God's sake. How would you feel if she suddenly started spitting all over you like a maniac?

(source)

John Edwards Punks Out

John Edwards has decided to give us all a break and get out of the presidential race. Good. Now there's only Hillary and Barack left. They can bicker freely back and forth at the debates without Edwards trying to score points off them by acting the "grown-up."

John - the only reason you didn't get sucked into the bickering yourself was because no one cared enough about you to attack you. Hillary and Barack were like, "When is this dipshit gonna just go away?"

Now we have the answer.

But don't despair John - you'll get that Attorney General post if Barack is elected. And if Hillary gets the job? Maybe she'll let you be ambassador to Circlejerkistan.

No George W., there isn't really a Circlejerkistan.

(source)

Two Haydens Almost Equal One Kerry

John Kerry could shove Hayden Panettiere up his butt and still have room for a bowling ball, a Thanksgiving turkey and half of Elisha Cuthbert.

What the hell were Kerry and The Pant talking about anyway? Probably something very important like whaling or ending global warming. My God, the two of them together...it's a perfect storm of boring.

Schnabel's Encounter With Drunken Young

Here's video of director Julian Schnabel's reaction to heckler Sean Young at the DGA Awards. Young allegedly yelled, "Get on with it!" to him, but you can't really hear her saying it in this vid. The clip differs slightly from initial accounts in that Schnabel never says, "Have another drink honey." He does tell Young to "Have another cocktail," which is somewhat more civilized I guess.

Young has since checked herself into a rehab facility by the way. When you start heckling no-name directors at awards ceremonies no one cares enough about to even televise - that's when you know it's time to get help.

Tom Cruise Is A Real Man

It's not like Tom Cruise needs to prove he's a man anymore. Nuh-uh. Everyone knows it. Just look at him - fucker exudes virile masculinity. And his man-musk is so powerful it causes female moose to explode from sheer sexual arousal (which is why he's been banned from Saskatchewan).

But just in case we had any doubts about what a man Tom is, he's gone and ordered himself a new motorcycle.

Oh, but not just any motorcycle - not for Tom Cruise. He's bought himself nothing less than a shiny new limited edition Ducati Desmosedici RR, valued at $72,500. And not just any new Ducati Whateverthefuck either - he's gonna get the first one to roll off the assembly line.

"We are delighted to be able to deliver the world's first production unit here in the USA to Tom Cruise, who is a well-known Ducati enthusiast," said Michael Lock, head of Ducati North America.

So Ducati has no problem being associated with Tom Cruise? That's good. Cause right now no one else will touch him.

Those Euros - they seem a little behind on this shit. They're the only ones who still like Michael Jackson too.

(source)

Angelina Is Pregnant

It's still not entirely confirmed, but it is beginning to look like Angelina Jolie really is honestly pregnant. A source has told US Weekly that she is anyway - take that for what it's worth - plus people who attended the SAG Awards say it was fairly obvious she was hiding a bump under her conspicuously voluminous dress.

No word yet on whether it's actually twins. And there's this tidbit...apparently, when confirmation-time does come around, Angie plans on selling exclusive rights to the story, and donating the money to charity.

So now we're not only selling the first baby pictures...we're selling the rights to exclusively report the confirmation. I know it's going to charity and all, but doesn't that still seem a tad, I don't know, self-important?

Why not sell the exclusive rights to be in the room when the first sonogram is taken? Why not cut a deal with some photographer to be the first one to get a picture of the new kid being shunned by the adopteds? They could finance an entire charitable endeavor just by fleecing chumps who actually think it's a big deal that the bitch is knocked up again.

Angie has the tabs eating out of her hand, doesn't she? Crafty demoness.

(source)

Ash signs ‘Robot’ for 1.5 crores

After the mind-blowing success of ‘Shivaji: The Boss’, director Shankar had announced that he will repeat the 57-year-old actor Rajnikant in ‘Robot‘ - a Rs.1 billion film, which the industry predicts will be a greater success. Maestro A.R. Rahman will compose the music. The film will be released in Hindi, Tamil and Telugu languages and will be distributed by London-based Ayingaran International.

Aishwarya Rai has been roped in by Shankar to pair opposite Rajnikant. Ash has signed the film for 1.5 crores and she has replaced Deepika Padukone who was considered earlier for the role. With this Rajnikanth has fulfilled his desire to work with Ash who couldn’t do Sivaji due to date problems. Meanwhile the official contract of the film has been approved by Amitabh Bachchan himself after altering few clauses and signed by Aishwarya.

Source : http://www.bollywood-stars.net/

Priyanka Chopra comes out clean

Priyanka Chopra has always been in news for her differences with the female co-stars. Her cat-fight with Kareena Kapoor is too well known. She also seems to share cold vibes with Lara Dutta with whom she worked in the early phase of her career. Now, media is abuzz with the tales of her differences with Kangana Ranaut with whom she stars in Madhur Bhandarkar’s forthcoming ‘Fashion’.

However, Priyanka denies any such difference with Kangana and said in an interview to a news agency, “Please stop thinking of us as rivals at each other’s throats. I worked with Kareena Kapoor and Lara Dutta in my two earliest films. We worked without any kind of tension. Now I hear I’m at loggerheads with Kangana while shooting for Madhur Bhandarkar’s ‘Fashion’. That I’m feeling threatened by her presence, when in fact we get along famously.”

“Kangana and I share a lot in common. Like me she’s an outsider who has been wholeheartedly embraced and adopted by Mumbai. Besides we’ve our individual space in ‘Fashion’. So this reported friction is again fiction,” Priyanka added.

Source : http://www.bollywood-stars.net/

I Find Mitt Romney Strangely Hot. Who's With Me?

I wouldn't mind too much if Mitt Romney became president. Call me shallow, but I could imagine worse fates than four years of staring at a distinguished-looking, handsome, well-groomed fellow with smoldering eyes. Even if he's a Republican Mormon who by definition thinks I'm the embodiment of evil.

Yes, I know - supporting Mitt Romney would be going against my own self-interests. If I really love my country, and want to make it a better place, I will vote for the dashing young Barack Obama who has been officially anointed the reincarnation of JFK...by no less an authority than JFK's own brother Teddy.

Barack ain't so bad to look at himself, actually. I could live with him becoming president too. John McCain though...no thanks. That guy's head looks like a baked potato after it's been in my microwave for a couple minutes. And frankly I've never gone for those military types. He probably says 0700 hours instead of 7 o'clock. At least we don't have to worry about him doing any one-armed push-ups to prove his manliness...

No McCain for me...and no Hillary Clinton either. What a disaster a Hillary presidency would be. I mean, can you imagine...some big international summit with all the great leaders of the world, the fate of humanity on the line and such, and out comes Hillary in her lemon-yellow pantsuit? Nightmare!

I'm sorry kids, but I'm just not ready for a woman president...who doesn't know how to dress herself. Condie Rice I could get behind, as long as she wore those knee-boots she likes so much. And Nancy Pelosi? Only if Rachel Zoe gave her a total makeover. God, and someone has to do something about that perpetual look of surprise she wears on her face. It's like she spends her whole life being flashed by her uncle.

These people are all freaks, when you get right down to it. And Mitt is no exception...but Mitt's freakiness is of a kind I find oddly appealing. He's just such a dope. Like when he tried to relate to the black folks. You saw that video right?



Mitt got savaged by all the smarty-pantses like Jon Stewart and Bill Maher - because those guys, as we know, are too hip for any room. And they love destroying guys like Mitt because he doesn't have a lick of irony, and because he looks like the kind of guy who nailed the hot cheerleaders they all wanted to fuck but couldn't get because they were too busy smoking pot and calling for people to be impeached. That's why the smart-alecks hate Romney - he reminds them of their miserable childhoods. They think Mitt has never experienced a second of frustration or disappointment in his entire life. They despise him because he's openly optimistic while they are suicidal misanthropes. They ascribe devious motives to him and insist that underneath his sunny, Reaganesque exterior there is only cynicism and calculation and hatred.

Well, poo on them. I like Mitt. I think he's a dear. So what if he's a Neo-Con war-monger waiting to happen? So we invade a few more Arab countries and make another few million young Muslims want to destroy us. We're fucked anyway. We might as well go down staring at someone cute who we don't mind being fooled by (as long as our fantasies include him getting the hell out before the sun comes up).

Britney Intervention Takes Unlikely Turn - Into Mercedes Dealership

Sleazy Sam Lutfi is involved in some kind of bizarre tug-of-war with Britney Spears's family over control of the apparently downward-spiraling pop-star's life. According to TMZ, Britney's mother Lynne and other members of the Spears clan are, even as we speak, staging some kind of intervention in hopes of getting Britney into treatment (the joke's on them cause she ain't a crazy person - she only plays one on the Internet). But Lutfi obviously doesn't want the intervention to succeed. In some kind of wacked-out strategic move, Lutfi convinced Britney - in the middle of the intervention - to head to a Mercedes dealership and shop for a new car. And Lynne even went along!

This is a genius ploy by Lutfi. Why? Think of what he's saying to Britney by making her go out to buy a new Mercedes. "This is a great life ain't it Brit?" Lutfi is telling her. "Spending your money as you see fit. Being extravagant. Answering to no one. But if they take control of your life, all that ends."

Lutfi is desperate to keep his spot in the poshest car on the Britney Spears gravy train. So he has to fight Lynne and the others. It's a gosh dang battle for Britney's soul y'all, and it's happening right in front of us!

(source)

Dunst Upset At Jake-Reese Affair

Kirsten Dunst is reportedly distraught over news that Jake Gyllenhaal and Reese Witherspoon may be pondering marriage.

“Hearing that [Jake and Reese] are close to getting engaged is like a knife to her heart,” a friend of Dunst's told Star Magazine.

“Seeing photos of him out with her kids is just too much to handle. She always thought she and Jake would reunite, but now those dreams have faded.”

Faded like her career? Like her attention to her personal hygiene? Like the world's interest in her snaggletoothed assed?

Here's the deal Kiki - you may have been hot enough at one time to nab Jake Gyllenhaal, but a lot has happened since then. For one thing...have you looked at yourself lately? And for another thing...well, Marie Antoinette wasn't exactly a smash, was it? Then you have Reese: Okay, maybe she's no beauty-queen, but she definitely has her shit together way more than you. She has an Oscar, and commands over $10 million a picture. Plus she has a settled personal life that includes kids and behaving like a responsible adult. And you? Your life is dating filthy rock-stars, and getting fall-down drunk on a nightly basis and basically making an ass of yourself. Jake may have been attracted to that sort of nonsense when he was younger, but he's grown up now. He's left you way, way behind. And it's time for you to realize that, and get over your delusional hopes that you and he will one day be reunited.

There is someone out there for you though Kiki - and his name is Pete Doherty. Look him up. You guys would be a fabulous couple...of pathetic wash-outs.

(source)

Con Man Dupes Cruise And Travolta

Tom Cruise and John Travolta both reportedly received phone calls in recent days from a man claiming to be Kim Ledger, the grieving father of Heath Ledger - and were both at least temporarily taken in by the con man.

According to the New York Post, the impostor convinced Cruise thoroughly enough to have "a couple phone conversations" with the actor, but was finally cut off after Ledger's people sent out a warning to Hollywood to be on the look-out for the fake Kim. Cruise's reps have since released a statement insisting Cruise realized almost immediately that the man was a charlatan and hung up the phone.

The Post also says that Travolta was initially talked into buying the impostor a plane ticket from Australia to the U.S., but caught on before going through with the purchase. Travolta's people, like Cruise's, claim that the actor saw through the fake Kim's charade almost immediately and never went so far as to agree to buy the ticket.

And what do Tom Cruise and John Travolta have in common besides being fat douches? Yes kids - they are both Scientologists.

If you're a con-man looking to bilk famous people, the obvious strategy is to choose Scientologists - because you already know what gigantic suckers they are.

Of course, in Cruise's case at least, you know there was more to it than just his being a dupe. You know Cruise wanted desperately to believe that this really was Heath Ledger's heartbroken father on the phone. Cause think about it: Heath Ledger may have died from using prescription drugs. Tom Cruise is on a crusade against prescription drugs. The grieving father calls Tom looking for support. Tom takes advantage of the father's grief by roping him in to being a Scientologist, a great "get" for Tom in his war on psychiatry. What a gigantic boost for Tom inside the Scientology world, not to mention the feast for his ravenous ego.

And that's what truly makes a world-class sucker - when your own crazy fixations blind you to the obvious.

(source)

Matthew Broderick Doesn't Care What You Think Of Him. Or His Dog.

The shit-green pants. Everything in this picture would be bearable, if not for the shit-green pants.

Hey Matthew - auditioning for a spot on the all-new Captain Kangaroo?

The dog is totally going to get his ass kicked by the cool dogs, but at least he's warm.

Eva Longoria Steps Out...Without Tony Parker

Eva Longoria is pals with Mario Lopez. They went out to dinner together. Tony Parker wasn't there.

Is that a toilet right behind Mario? What kind of fucking restaurant is that?

Okay, I'm not trying to suggest that Mario and Eva are fucking. Everyone knows they're fucking, so there's no need for me to suggest it. What I want to know is whether they really have three-ways with Tony. And if Eva only consents to these three-ways because Tony constantly begs her. And if Tony and Mario end up all over each other, with poor Eva off to the side looking pissed for awhile before she finally leaves to watch the View episodes she Tivoed or maybe do some mopping (with a cigarette dangling precariously from her lips, and her eyes going to the ceiling every time there's a particularly loud scream of ecstasy).

You know that totally happens.

Michael Lohan Is God's Instrument

Michael Lohan is on the warpath against a drug dealer who wants to blab to the tabs about Lindsay's habit.

"I've been looking for the people who've been selling my daughter and these other kids the drugs," ex-convict Michael said. "And come hell or high water, one day I'm going to expose them. God is going to get even with this guy."

I see. So Michael isn't merely trying to shut this pusher up to keep him from destroying what's left of Lindsay's career - he's actually on a righteous crusade against the guy. A crusade that has been mandated by the almighty.

Sounds to me like Michael's the one who's been associating with drug dealers, and more importantly their products.

(source)

More Staged Britney Nonsense

Tonight we bring you another episode of Britney Spears: Ride the Crazy Train. In the latest installment, Britney has a confrontation with her manager Sam Lutfi. A distraught Brit calls boyfriend Adnan Ghalib to come over straight away and rescue her from the enraged Sam. But Sam tells the security guards to keep Adnan out. And someone calls the LAPD to keep back all the paps trying to get a picture of the mayhem!

Adnan's photo agency releases a statement explaining his role in the tomfoolery:

Adnan did not try to break into Britney’s house. Anyone who claims that to be the case has been severely misinformed.

The truth is that Sam Lutfi started an argument with Britney and the two ended up in a screaming fight. Sam continued to verbally abuse Britney as she sat barefoot on the curb at her Summit home crying holding her dog London.

Britney called Adnan for help and he heard the distress in her voice and drove to the Summit immediately. While outside the gates he was denied access as Sam Lutfi had informed the guards that he was not allowed entry. When Adnan then tried to call Britney it seems that Sam had turned all of her cell phones off.

Oh my God...what will happen next?

(source)(source)

Brad Pitt Makes With The Funny Face

She really is driving him over the edge isn't she?

Britney Spears Is Getting Treatment

Britney's shady pal Sam Lutfi has told Barbara Walters that Britney is starting treatment for mental issues.

"There is a man named Sam Lutfi, who is the manager and very good friend of Britney," Walters said today on The View. "He has been staying with her constantly.

"He got in touch with us... I can't vouch for this... He seemed to be very knowledgeable and he certainly was very nice.

"He said Britney was suffering from what he describes as mental issues which are treatable.

"He said that she has been to a psychiatrist and ... I assume she is starting some kind of treatment.

"She has been having mood swings. She has been having some kind of trouble sleeping."

There are several alarming things about this. One, Sam Lutfi is now acting as Britney's spokesman. Two, Lutfi has Barbara Walters's number. Three, Barbara Walters is repeating shit Sam Lutfi told her. Four, Barbara Walters is still on the air. Five, Barbara Walters is still above ground.

All lies. Everyone knows by now that Britney is not crazy and the whole thing is an act. Lutfi was simply helping to perpetuate the fiction of Britney's insanity by contacting Walters and telling her this crap. And why Walters? Because she is old and senile and no longer possesses even a shred of journalistic judgment. If some random person called Barbara and told her Vladimir Putin had been caught in a love-nest with Condoleezza Rice, Barbara would not even bother trying to find a corroborating source. She would go on the air with the story as if it were the gospel truth.

As for Britney...she hasn't ripped her clothes off in public lately, so that's good right?

(source)

Sean Young Hits 10 On The Crazy-Scale

Sean Young has emerged from her cocoon, where she spent the last several years storing up crazy, readying herself for her grand rebirth. And where did the fabled maniac strike this time? The Directors' Guild Awards.

Why she was actually there, no one can say. She was in rare form though. Clearly soused, and in the company of a man who was said to be "oblivious" to her antics, Ms. Young randomly picked out targets from amongst the high-falutin. According to witnesses, Ms. Young variously heckled Marion Cotillard, shouted things at a clip of George Clooney from Michael Clayton, burst spontaneously into song, and, most notoriously, shouted obscenities at The Diving Bell and the Butterfly director Julian Schnabel, who bravely stared down the legendary maniac, shouting back at her, "Have another drink, honey." It was at this point that security decided to cut Ms. Young's act short. A guard took her by the arm, dragged her out through a side door and tossed her.

Oh, if only every awards show had Sean Young. Imagine how much more fun last night's stuffy SAG Awards would've been had Sean been there to yell hideously inappropriate things. Like at the end of Daniel Day-Lewis's speech when he dedicated his award to Heath Ledger. How much better would that have been had Sean then stood up and screamed, "Did him!" Or when Julie Christie paid tribute to the striking writers. What did that moment need? Sean Young hollaring, "Who did your make-up, a mortician? Get off the stage you dried-up old crone. I could've played your part in my sleep. And without expelling the reek of the crypt from my vagina!"

I love Sean Young.

(source)

Leah Rimini Has A Message For You

Leah Rimini is the latest high-profile Scientologist to have her wackiness exposed to the public. There's no video this time unfortunately...just a nutty email addressed from Rimini to struggling Scientologists. And here it is in all its lunatic glory:

Hi!

This is Leah Remini Writing you again. Some of you may know me from the TV show "King of Queens", but what is more important is that I am now OT V and at one point I was a very stalled Clear. A lot of people helped me to get OT, and I decided I was going to turn around and help every Clear make it to OT.

A couple of months ago, you received a letter from me about an event I was holding to help people move who were stalled on the Bridge. Obviously you did not come and for some reason, feel you are not indeed a "stalled Clear". Let me start with the definition of
"stalled". Not that you are-but who knows? STALL: To slow down or halt the progress of. (American Heritage Student Dictionary). If you are not aggressively moving on your next step-your next "Gradechart Action", you are stalled. Look at the Gradechart, it says: Clear- Sunshine Rundown-Solo Course Part 1-OT Preparations and so on up the chart. If you are not on your next step as per this chart, and are not on a prerequisite for Solo, you are stalled-plain and simple.

If your C/S has CS ed you for the PTS SP course, or some other
needed action to get you rolling up the GRADECHART faster, then do it, and do it fast. I have experience being a Stalled Clear. I was
the kind of gal who went on course MAYBE a period a day, only on
weekdays, and that was ONLY if I had the time. I felt I deserved a
special award for being there and they couldn't possibly ask for
more. I remember thinking and saying out loud, "I WILL NEVER be like those idiots who wait 10 years to go OT!" 10 years later, I hadn't moved. I mean I did everything else but move on to Solo One. I did other courses, I got myself in to trouble, then needed some FPRD and then I would finish that and it would be "my finances"... I would hear people talk to me about other Clears and refer to them as "stalled Clears" and I would be like "Yeah-they are totally stalled. You guys should handle them." Never once did I think "I" was a stalled Clear, because I was always doing something. Once my mother told me I was stalled and I actually thought she was an idiot. Really, I thought "Wow, she really should handle that." I also thought she just didn't know me. My mom is OT VII and a Class VI. She did know me and she was right. So, it is up to you now to be honest with yourself and look at your own progress up the Bridge.

Do you ever wonder why you are not moving? No? Then that's an outpoint. You are Clear, you are special, why have you not moved? Whatever the reason, there is an answer and a solution. I don't care what it is: you were not serviced right or fast enough, people don't get you, you have other things going on that we don't get, you are helping others, you are upset, you haven't been acked, your life is actually going well, your life is not going well, there's no money there's no time, if you were a millionaire you would do it no problem, you are waiting for your 2D to make it, there's no urgency, you are not sure if you have what it takes to be OT, you hated your auditor, you don't like the parking situation...WHATEVER IT IS, IT IS STOPPING YOU AND THERE IS A REASON FOR THAT!

Why am I telling you this and who the hell am I writing you? Do you think that I have nothing better to do with my time than write you letters and put on events? Do you think I make some sort of
commission off you? The answer is that I don't have better things to do than to support my group and help when I can. Clears ARE my group. And no- I don't make a dime. Does that make you wonder, "Why the hell does she care?". Or... "Why does the Org care?" Well, when you do your levels you too will care. Sept 11th (9/11) kicked me in the ass.

I finally realized that all it takes is a few madmen to take us all
down. There I was, just running on my treadmill thinking life is
okay. I'm going on course every so often, (when I had time) and BAM! Life has changed. I suddenly thought, "Oh my God, what if I'm stuck in this condition again and I have to--what? Do it all over again? Where would I go? What would I do? Would some secret Scientology police come down and save me? Is there a secret back-up plan? I was sure there was. But there isn't . All it would take is another tragic event to happen again and we are all done. There will be no planet for us to be stalled, or "just doing okay" on. There would be nothing! The only plan is for you to move on up to OT as fast as you can. That is the secret. Really. I am asking you to get it together. You are in charge and responsible for what you do this lifetime. Not being on course and not doing your next step is getting you where?

Play out the scenario-there you are being a Clear, being right about whatever it is that is keeping you from being on course and doing
your next step. Years go by, you are making money, you have a nice house and a nice car. You spent time with those friends you wanted to hang out with, you cleaned out the garage, you traveled. You do all the things that were keeping you from taking your next step. Then what? Then you are going to move? I hate to say this but you are lying to yourself. You need to move now, regardless of your situation. Are you just going to keep in place what you have had sitting there for lifetimes to come? Do you think we are just going to be here forever? So I say knock off any critical thought right now that you may have about me, the orgs, your FSM, your auditor, anyone else, and contact us so we can help you. All you need to do is just reach once and we can help. LRH was very clear on what we need to do- obviously in some way you are out of agreement with that. That again, is an outpoint, and we can help you with that.

You're waiting because of money? Or for your wife to do it first or
for you to strike it rich? It will not happen without your decision
to go up the levels. That is the truth. You owe it to yourself, your
family, and to mankind to move and move NOW.

In closing, this is not going to happen often. I am only doing this
again because some of you did not show. I hope to see you on
September 28th at 11:30am at the AOLA atrium for a second chance.

There will be brunch served, free of course! Do this for yourself-
just blow through whatever it is that is sitting there, and just
come. It's not going to kill you- I promise!

Much love,
Leah Remini

Oh there's brunch? Good. Cause I like to have a little bite before I get hammered in my brain by a bunch of fucking crazy people.

Reading that was, I have to say, almost as excruciating as the three hour Scientology summit/infomerical I subjected myself to the other night after downloading it. But, this is the sort of thing I'm willing to do...because I am a crusader against Scientology.

Actually, I don't give a flying fuck about Scientology, except that it makes for fantastic comic material. I am way too lazy to be a crusader against anything. I don't even get upset and complain when I buy something at the grocery store and it turns out to be spoiled. I just throw it away or cook it real good and eat it anyway. That's cause I'm a doormat. I'm only aggressive and angry on this blog. I just wanted to clear that, so that hopefully I will be able to get off the bridge and become OT. Or whatever the fuck.

(source)

Marion Cotillard At SAG Awards

The divine Ms. Marion Cotillard graces the SAG Awards.

Michelle Pfeiffer Rocks The SAG Red Carpet

Look everybody, it's Michelle Pfeiffer. You know. The Catwoman who didn't suck.

Brad And Angie Inside The SAG Awards

"Don't worry honey. I've got the emergency numbers tattooed right here on my palm. See? Police. Fire. Ambulance. Suicide hotline. Plastic surgeon..."



"Hey Clooney. How's it working out with the stripper? Dope."



"Why do I taste sulfur?"


"Do you think if I blew you every night for two weeks we could get ourselves another..."

"Don't even say it."

"But I want another..."

"You can blow me every hour on the hour for the rest of my life honey, but there is no fucking way I'm adopting another one."

"Fine. Fuck you then. I'm calling Ryan Gosling. I'm sure he'd appreciate a blow-job..."

Angie And Brad At SAG Awards

The SAG Awards are tonight. Red carpet pics everybody!

Angie's wearing a loose dress. Jack up those pregnancy rumors.

Yup, right on cue.



Is he holding her arm or checking for a pulse?

Longoria Gets Her SAG On

Hey Eva, it's called the SAG Awards, not the Westminster Dog Show.

Eh, I actually like Longoria. She makes me laugh.

Ashley Tisdale, SAG Awards

Ashley Tisdale blows a kiss. Would someone please teach these dumb little Disney tramps a new move?

Teri Hatcher At SAG Awards

Teri...it's the SAG Awards, not the HAG Awards. Hahahahahaha...

Michelle Williams Wanted Sole Custody Of Matilda

More details are coming out about what a mess Heath Ledger's life was in the months leading up to his death. The latest revelation: Ledger believed his ex-fiancee Michelle Williams was set to seek sole custody of their daughter Matilda, on the grounds that Heath's drug-taking made him a bad influence.

The dirt comes from Rebecca White, an alleged member of Ledger's "inner-circle." White told the Daily Mail:

Heath believed Michelle was going for sole custody.

She wanted nothing to do with him and many of his friends believed that in the last couple of weeks that really pushed him over the edge. He was getting more reckless than ever with cocaine and heroin.

His use of downers - sleeping pills and anti-anxiety pills and antidepressants- was also getting heavier because he needed them to sleep.

Heath was a very shy, insecure man. But in celebrity circles you need something to ground you, and for him that was being a father and the idea that Michelle might still take him back and they might still be a family.

Even though he was seeing other women, there was one side of him that still wanted their relationship to work. But there was also the side that depended on drugs because he felt like a fish out of the water.

He was not the type to have killed himself. The way I hear it, he went out the night before, he was doing cocaine, he wasn't able to sleep, and the investigators think he woke up, didn't remember taking sleeping pills and then took what accidentally was an overdose.

White says the Ledger/Williams relationship was a disaster waiting to happen from the beginning:

It was this movie-set romance and Michelle got unexpectedly pregnant. It absolutely would not have lasted if she hadn't.

He was still seeing other women. Heath was an Adonis and she was dowdy and not in his league - careerwise or looks-wise - and no one could understand why they got together. I knew Heath used drugs because the first time I met him, at Puff Daddy's house in Los Angeles, Heath asked Naomi [Campbell] for cocaine. At another party in Paris, Heath took at least six Ecstasy pills, popped them in his mouth all at once and swigged them with a bottle of champagne.

He was a partygoer and Michelle was quite straight. But when she got pregnant, Michelle was determined to have the baby. Heath wanted to do the right thing and stick by her.

Ledger's lifestyle finally got to be too much for the teetotaling Michelle:

Michelle kicked Heath out because he would be showing up all hours of the night with this band of hangers-on and doing drugs.

Michelle started to talk about going for sole custody. She wanted to be responsible 100 per cent.

She felt he couldn't be responsible for the baby because he wasn't responsible for himself.

He got deeper and deeper into drugs as his fears of losing Matilda increased.

Heath was at least as messed-up as Pete Doherty it sounds like. The difference being that Heath managed to keep his excesses mostly private, while people like Doherty seem to deliberately make a public nuisance of themselves. Still, it has not been proven that Ledger died of a drug overdose. The latest is that his death may have been from natural causes. What "natural causes" means when you're already a drug addict who sleeps 2 hours a night is hazy at best. Maybe he had a weakened heart and didn't die directly from the sleeping pills...but what caused the weakened heart? There was nothing natural about that guy's death, I don't care what anyone says.

By the way...Michelle Williams is "dowdy?" I think she's quite beautiful. That Rebecca White chick needs glasses.

(source)

Adnan Ghalib Peddling Britney Vids

Britney's skeezy pap lover Adnan Ghalib is peddling videos he's made of the disintegrating pop-star, claims News of the World. Predictably, the videos do not show Britney in a flattering light. NOTW's account of the three clips that have been made available:

CLIP No1 shows Britney sitting on her bed wearing a nightie. She talks about herself in the third person and rambles about her childhood. She's heard saying:

"When Britney was a child, she had to work really hard. When she was 13 years old, she won all the beauty pageants."

CLIP No2 shows Brit wrapped in a white bath towel, again perched on the edge of the bed. Talking to thin air, she mumbles:

"Britney has an angel looking out for her, don't you, angel?"

CLIP No3 sees Britney talking to Adnan, who's holding the camera, and calling him by his pet name Bubba.

She smiles: "I'm really happy. Bubba's here for me now. It's all good."

The tab claims there are six videos in all, three of which Ghalib is holding back. The pap, it's alleged, is seeking $2 million for the whole collection. I think he's underestimating the market though. I think there's someone out there who would gladly pay $5 million for that shit. It's Britney Spears, bitches. If the world is nothing but a crazy train, then Britney is the freaking conductor. She's up there in the engine with a big old hat on yelling "Woo-woo" at the top of her lungs. Hell, $10 million might be more like it.

Seriously...Britney's relationship with Ghalib has got to be one the most fucked-up in history, doesn't it? I mean, I've heard of co-dependency, but co-exploitation? That's basically what this deal is right now. Britney gets her perverse kicks by stringing this poor peasant along, and Ghalib gets paid by glomming on to poor friendless attention-starved clueless Britney and selling the footage. Of course, it's possible I'm being completely naive about the whole thing. It's possible Britney participated willingly in the creation of the videos and will get half of whatever they bring in.

Actually, when you think about it, the whole Britney/Ghalib association makes perfect sense. Britney's whole life is one endless reality show. She makes money by striking deals with photo agencies which document said life. It's merely a matter of convenience, having one of the paps as a boyfriend. He can get the real inside exclusive stuff that no one else can, then sell it, then split the money with her. The more I think about it, the more I suspect that Ghalib and Britney are probably in a room someplace counting their cash and giggling at all us idiots. Or maybe I'm giving Britney too much credit? I don't know. I just have a feeling that, when the truth is revealed, we'll find out the whole thing was one big sham. Britney was never crazy, and Ghalib was specifically hired to be her personal pap. Will that be a scandal, or will everyone just yawn?

(source)

I Refuse To Exploit Miley Cyrus By Posting Her Naughty Pictures

It would be easy to jump on the bandwagon and post the leaked pictures of Miley Cyrus that some people think are so naughty (and Charlie Sheen copied and set as his desktop). But I refuse. That's a sick game and I won't play it.

So, you won't be seeing any pictures like this:


Or this:


I repeat...I refuse to post naughty Miley Cyrus pictures or Miley Cyrus leaked pictures or Miley Cyrus MySpace pictures or Hannah Montana underwear pics. No way. Not this little black duck.

Cloverfield

I salute J.J. Abrams. He gave his all to the task of taking every monster movie cliche imaginable and re-packaging them so as to make them no longer seem quite so hoary and lame. He didn't succeed, but he deserves kudos for the effort. In a world of cynical lazy-asses, J.J. at least gives a damn.

In case you haven't heard, Cloverfield is a giant new movie about a monster terrorizing New York. And no, the monster is not Harvey Fierstein or the risen corpse of Leona Helmsley - those movies would've been too scary to even be released. This monster is big and icky and may have come from the sea or perhaps space. Or it may have crawled out of Ed Koch's butt. That's never really answered. The important thing is that it's gigantic and it likes knocking over buildings. It's like the world's angriest architectural snob. "Monster can't stand Chicago School. Must smash!" It also defiles the Statue of Liberty by biting its head off and spitting it into a skyscraper. That's not nearly as horrid a desecration as what happened to the statue in Ghostbusters II. Or just the fact of it being in Ghostbusters II.

The movie has not been shot like a typical Roland Emmerich-style disaster epic - thank God. J.J. Abrams has tried to break new ground with his technique, so the whole movie is shot from the point-of-view of a single guy with a digital camera.

All right, so it's only ground-breaking if you forget about The Blair Witch Project. Which I'm very happy to do. Because it sucked. And I still have nightmares about that one actress with the runny nose. What ever happened to her? If you live in Hoboken and go to a lot of dinner theater, look around for her for us. Thanks.

Back to Cloverfield...this shaky-cam technique makes everything very crazy and first-person. I personally liked it. Of course, the conceit is a somewhat difficult one to maintain. At first the action is all in this party full of yuppies who are saying goodbye to one dude who's moving to Japan (the joke being that monsters usually attack Japan...but not this time bitch). The cameraman is some dopey guy who's supposed to be taping farewell messages but he's more interested in some chick who sort of looks like Milla Jovovich. Anyway, it's easy to roll with the idea that this guy is filming random stuff and just gets too immersed in his work, which is why he spends the whole night obnoxiously following people around. It gets somewhat harder to swallow, however, after the monster strikes. Dude, it's like, drop the camera and run! No...he needs to film the carnage, for posterity. Okay, it's a stretch, but I can dig it.

Everyone ends up fleeing the party, and Abrams conveniently whittles the number of protagonists down to four. Soon they're all in a subway tunnel and of course the camera conveniently has night-vision. Then these little mini-monsters attack from the ceiling...yeah there are mini-monsters. They're basically little blurs of lashing arms. Of course the dude with the camera never stops filming, even when his friends are being attacked. Cause there'd be no movie.

Here's how the hoary cliches work themselves in. "You know, any sensible person would just flee the city as fast as possible, but I've got to be a hero and go save the girl I love who's trapped in a building the monster has attacked. And my faithful buddy with the camera is going to follow me because...because...we're buds for life and that's what buds too. And also my dead brother's girlfriend will come along and the random Milla-looking chick because...um...help me out here..."

Abrams stretches credulity in finding excuses for the characters to keep going toward danger instead of away. Which is pretty much how all these movies work. And I'm sure Abrams realized how clunky his underlying mechanism was...but he didn't care. He counted on the sheer physical experience of the film carrying the viewer through. It does. The first moments when the monster attacks are gripping, with their shamelessly inappropriate echoes of 9/11 (Spielberg did the same thing in War of the Worlds, so that makes it all right I guess), and though the movie loses a lot of its initial momentum it remains compelling throughout.

And no, I did not get sick from the shaky-cam. Didn't even get queasy. Some people have weak stomachs. I don't know what would happen if you sat next to a really smelly person though and were a little sick to begin with. Like some beer-belching asshole, the kind who giggles every time someone dies. I wish the Cloverfield monster would go to those people's houses and eat them. Then, I want it to go to Paris and devour the Centre Pompidou. Cause it's ugly and stupid.

I basically want to be friends with the Cloverfield monster. I think he may just be misunderstood. Is it a he? It gives birth to the mini-monsters so it must be a she. Unless Cloverfields are both. Or neither. Damn, Fred Phelps is so going to condemn the Cloverfields. "Down to hell with you evil statue-chomping thing from the depths of the sea or perhaps space." Call in an air-strike on Fred Phelps! Okay I'm rambling.

Cloverfield gets 3 Chips Ahoy out of 4. It's rated PG13 for rampant yuppie obnoxiousness, scary whip-arm things attacking people and the wanton destruction of national monuments.

Tara Reid Feels Persecuted

Tara Reid thinks the press is picking on her, and that just ain't right. The oft-drunk party girl insists she never did anything to deserve such scorn - unlike certain other young skanks.

"What have I ever really done?" Reid says. "Dance on a table? When Lindsay Lohan and Paris Hilton got their DUIs they got punished, they deserved it.

But my punishment, I don't feel like it fits the crime. I don't understand why people punish others for being happy."

I don't even know where to begin Tara. First of all, no one really cares enough about you to "punish" you. Your press coverage is more mocking than anything else, and let's face it, you brought that on yourself. You wanted the attention - or are we supposed to believe your boobs came out of your dress on accident all those times? Not likely.

Furthermore, you my dear are clearly not happy. Happy people don't get hammered every damn night of the week, and they certainly don't spend thousands on plastic surgery, then more thousands to reverse the effects of the original surgery. You are in abject misery every day of your life, and frankly, that's how we want you to be. If you became truly happy, you would no longer be good for even the few chuckles you give us once every few months. And really, what else are you going to do with your life? Are you going to start up a bed & breakfast or maybe go back to college and go for that law degree? No. You are a silly drunk whore Tara...it's what you were born to be, and you perform the role adequately.

(source)

Fred Phelps Gets Wild

Fred knows how to party. And he loves sucking cock.

Ledger Ill On Film Shoot

Heath Ledger was in the middle of filming Terry Gilliam's The Imaginarium of Dr. Parnassus when he passed. Ledger's co-star on the film, Christopher Plummer, talks about the illness Heath was battling the last time he saw the doomed star:

Heath did have a terrible, lingering bug in London, and he couldn't sleep at all. We all - I thought he'd probably got walking pneumonia, which they seem to think he had. Of course, I don't really know, but that's the latest...

The last few days we were shooting outside a pub. Always outside. Cold as bejesus. You know how damp it gets in London. And at night the temperature drops horribly, and that little breeze gets up. You have to wear tons of stuff...

Shooting at night in a big city, it's not easy.... We were working in such dire conditions in London, outside every night in the cold. Which may have contributed somewhat to his health. We were all armed with antibiotics all the time. It wasn't exactly joyous, except that the film itself was fun to do.

Heath's death is sort of literally unbelievable, because apart from the sleeping, he was in such good form.... There was a sweetness about him. He was a very charming and gentle guy, actually... I just left a very laughing, happy fellow, practically a few minutes ago.

(source)

Salman Khan - Guess who is the real one?

This Tuesday, Salman Khan at Madame Tussaud’s museum, unveiled his wax statue before hundreds of adoring fans. Salman’s muscular statue, dressed in a black sleevless T-shirt and black denims, donated by the star, stands in a special Bollywood section alongside those of three other Mumbai greats - Amitabh Bachchan, Aishwarya Rai and Shah Rukh Khan.

“I am really very touched that my fans have chosen me to appear in Madame Tussauds, and hope that the figure brings a lot of enjoyment to Bollywood followers the world over,” Salman said.

Salman Khan won the public poll for the staute beating nine other Indian mega stars - including Madhuri Dixit, Hrithik Roshan, Lata Mangeshkar and Abhishek Bachchan.

Source : http://www.bollywood-stars.net/

Kangana Ranaut with her first endorsement

Finally, Kangana Ranaut has bagged her first endorsement project, and that too opposite none other than Salman Khan. Kangana has been chosen by a leading international shoes company Red Tape to endorse their brand of footwear which had been endorsed by Salman Khan so far.

Until now Red Tape manufactured footwear only for men with Salman as their ambassador. Now, the company is launching its female lineup with Kangana, who has already shot spots for hoardings and magazines and will soon be doing a TV ad with Salman Khan for the brand.

Apparently Red Tape has paid Kangana a whopping figure and has promised to enhance the amount by thirty percent in the next financial year. On being questioned about the reason for she being chosen for the brand, Kangana explains, “It was my my casual looks, I guess. The brand isn’t associated with formal shoes. Only sporty footwear, sneakers etc. They want me to endorse their shoes in my jeans and with my curly hair.”

Kangana is very excited about working with Salman, “It’s a good thought. I’m excited about the ad with Salman. I’ve always been his fan. I think he’s the only rock star in our cinema. I had watched him dance at an awards function and thought I’d be paired with him one day. It’s happening sooner than I thought.”

Source : http://www.bollywood-stars.net/