Human garden hose Nicole Richie has told heinous old sell-out Diane Sawyer in an interview that she is indeed four months pregnant, and that it's boyfriend Joel Madden's baby. Richie also spoke to Sawyer about her impending jailtime. Said the reality TV imbecile:
I have a responsibility and it's something that I did wrong, and if I could personally apologize to every single person that has lost a loved one from drunk driving I would. And unfortunately, I can't, but this is my way of paying my dues and taking responsibility and being an adult.
Nicole - fuck you, all right? People like you honestly make me sick. You fuck up, and then you act like you should be given a medal because you deign to "take responsibility" for your actions. Here's a suggestion - how about not getting loaded on booze, pills and pot and driving the wrong way down the highway in the first place? And how about abstaining in future from bringing up all the people who've died from drunk driving, as if your acknowledgement of their deaths and your sorrow over them somehow made you seem noble and of strong character. Who do you think you are now, Angelina Jolie? No - even Angelina is not as disgusting and worthless and full of shit as you.
And Diane Sawyer - seriously, how do you sleep at night? You've interviewed Fidel Castro, Saddam Hussein, Bill Clinton, Bob McNamara and Nancy Reagan, and now you're serving as a means for Nicole Richie to smooth over her image problems? Maybe next you'd like to assist Pete Doherty in getting back with Kate Moss? Or perhaps you'd like to lend Michael Lohan a hand in patching things up with Lindsay. Honestly, it's one thing for a low-rent loser like me to try (in vain) to make a living exploiting the hardships of others, but there's no excuse for you Diane. At this point, I see no solution but for you to bite down on a cyanide capsule and go to sleep forever.
Oh, and by the way - it ain't Joel Madden's baby. It's Jeff Goldblum's, and everyone knows that.
(source)
