John Graziano, the ex-Marine who was critically injured when Nick Hogan crashed the car the two were speeding in, will likely spend the rest of his life in a nursing home, it has been revealed. According to nurse Joanne Jones, Graziano doesn't respond to touch or sound and has fixed pupils - so basically he's a vegetable. As seems to always happen in Florida, members of Graziano's family are fighting over his guardianship. Yesterday a court granted temporary rights to Graziano's mother Debra, ruling against John's father Edward who claims Nick Hogan's family is paying Debra to stop her from suing them. John was apparently not wearing a seat belt when he and Nick Hogan crashed into a palm tree in Clearwater, Florida on August 26th.
Nick Hogan did release a couple half-assed statements about the whole Graziano affair - posting on a place called Supraforums.com. Here's what darling little Nicky said:
john is expected to make a full recovery its just a slow process for him to wake up because he was in a medically induced coma by a drug called pentabarb which takes weeks to wear off which is why the wake up process is is so slow. his entire body is perfect , he just hit his head.
Leave it to the dickweed kid of a dickweed celebrity to write a line like "he just hit his head." Oh yeah Nick - what the hell does a person need a head for? Actually, John really doesn't need his for anything anymore, since about the only things he can manage at this point are a blink and gag reflex. But what the hell - that's how the cookie crumbles right? If he hadn't wanted to get fucked-up, he should've been wearing his seatbelt. Right Nick? That's what you said yourself in this posting:
everyone please drive safe and wear your seatbelts, i had mine on and only broke my wrist, john did not and he is in a far worse stae [sic] than i am. thank u for the support -nick hogan/bollea
It's debatable, Nicky dear, whether John is in a "far worse state" than you are. Right now he's a total vegetable - but it seems to me that you aren't far behind him. The only real difference is that his brain-damage was caused by the crash, whereas you were obviously brain-damaged from birth. Not a huge surprise given that your father is Hulk Hogan and his sperm was probably all mutated and fucked-up from the steroids. Seriously - there ought to be a law against freaks like Hulk Hogan even having children. I mean, Nick and Brooke Hogan? What better argument could there be against mandatory sterilization? Someone should've chopped this guy's winky off like the retarded dude in The Sound and the Fury a long time ago. Hogan was an inbred affront to nature to begin with and then you add the chromosomal damage from the horse steroids and whatever wacky shit he was taking - that's a recipe for disaster.
Of course, little Nicky is a celebrity's kid, and therefore thinks himself blameless in this whole affair. In fact, Nicky thinks it's a hoot that he's frequently pulled over for driving recklessly and never gets in trouble. Here's what the cretinous little fuck told some rag called Rides Magazine not long before the crash:
In my silver Viper, I was driving from Miami to Tampa. I got pulled over going 107 [mph] and the guy let me off. He’s like, "Hey, I know who you are, just keep going, ya know." Dude, I got back on the road and two minutes later I get pulled over going 113 [mph]. Another highway patrol from the same county said, "I just heard on the radio that my buddy pulled you over and let you go. I’ma let you go this time. It’s your second warning. You get pulled over again, you’re probably going to go to jail." Three minutes later, [I was] doing 123 [mph] in a 50 [mph zone]. The guy is like, "Hey, I just heard you got pulled over twice in the last 10 minutes. I got to write you a ticket."
Wow, law-enforcement officers - way to protect the public there. And way to go Hulk Hogan - you did an amazing job raising this kid. What an up-standing little member of society you've created. Seriously - people like this are the reason Crabbie doesn't like driving anyplace. There's me in my little beat up Pontiac with my seatbelt on and no cell phone and not even any radio cause I don't wanna get distracted (actually it's broken but the other thing sounds better), driving 55 exactly when it says 55, and still I'm a nervous wreck because I know it only takes one little irresponsible asshole Nick Hogan-type to come flying around the curve like the cocksucking Millennium Falcon trying to make the Kessel Run in less than 12 parsecs and I'm a god-damn grilleburger. And of course the other asshole only gets a scratch, and ten minutes later he's in some bar bragging to his buds about the awesome head-on he had with some nerdy fag in a beater. The only bad thing, confesses the homo-killing Nick Hogan-type, is that his Charger's all fucked but them's the breaks.
This is the world we live in. If there were any justice, Nick Hogan would now be on an all-liquid diet with no hope of his limbs or more importantly his reproductive system ever working again. But, there is no justice - so Nick will marry some slag and pump out a bunch of even-more brain-damaged kids (cause it gets worse from one generation to the next, especially when cousins marry) and they'll all be whizzing around in their souped-up rigs splattering people like bugs and laughing mindlessly at what a gas it all is. And grandpappy Hulk will be there giggling toothlessly while some chesty nurse feeds him his jello and whispers about the great hand-job she's gonna give him as soon as he's done eating. God damn - why couldn't I have been born in 1600? I'd rather deal with plague and being burned at the stake than this shit.
(source)
(thanks to Crabbiefan Audra for the tip. hope I ripped him good enough for you.)
