Fat homosexual actor John Travolta has the perfect solution to the global-warming crisis - leave our damaged earth and colonize another planet. Great plan John! Uh...how?
Oh, John doesn't deal in those little technicalities - he's the visionary; it's up to some little guys with coke-bottle glasses to fill in the details. Anyway, here's what John says about his ingenious mass emigration scheme:
I think that everyone can do their bit, but I'm wondering if we have to start thinking about other planets and also domed cities, because I don't know if there's a way to repair these holes in the sky.
Other planets and domed cities. Yes, John. Because life is just like an L. Ron Hubbard novel. Somebody will design some kind of crazy exotic propulsion system one of these days - I don't know, maybe one that runs on pure stupidity - and we'll all use the thing to fly off to some distant star where there's a nice, ready-made earth we can claim as our own, and build cities of Buckminster Fuller dome-houses on. And I suppose everyone on this new world will believe in Scientology too? Of course they will - what else would they believe? Why do you need anything else when you have Scientology? Rational thought? Bah. That's for dunderheads. The real answers to our problems all lie in a philosophy concocted by a second-rate science-fiction writer as a means of justifying his misogyny and venting his delusions of god-like grandeur. God, John - what would we do without brilliant minds like yours to guide us? We'd all be lost, that's for sure.
(source)
