Hey, Ashlee Simpson - Lindsay Lohan is ripping off your act. See? She's doing that no-eye-contact move. And, frankly, her face is starting to look as fake as yours. God, what member of the animal kingdom is Lindsay trying to imitate with those lips? The pussy-mouthed Ugandan tree-sloth?
Dang, those must've been some good mushrooms.
At first glance, I thought that was Elisha Cuthbert sitting there. Wow, I was thinking, Lindsay stole Paris's friend. Paris is going to be so pissed. But, it's not Elisha. And Lindsay - yup, she looks like she's about ready to hurl. Oh, the life of a starlet, so fraught with peril, so fueled with booze and dope, so spattered with vomit.
