Fans of '90s tabloid sensationalism remember the story: Greasy Long Island mechanic Joey Buttafuoco was cheating on his wife Mary Jo with 17-year-old "Lolita" Amy Fisher, and Amy got jealous one day, shot Mary Jo in the face (she lived) and ended up in jail for seven years. The story made headlines all over the world; Amy became so famous that she was even played by Drew Barrymore in a bad TV movie. But that was 15 long years ago - today Joey and Mary Jo are no longer married; Joey is going through a divorce after splitting with the woman he wed after Mary Jo; and Amy is out of jail and divorcing her own husband with whom she's had two kids. And now, according to The Insider, notorious lovers Joey and Amy have gotten back together - and are of course planning on launching a reality show. Because that's what you do when you are a total dirtbag with nothing worthwhile to offer the world.
It might sound like a great idea on the surface - trainwreck TV starring an ex-convict slut and the man who pushed her to murder. Unfortunately, the reality thing has gotten so rote by this point that nothing really spontaneous or interesting ever happens. It's all bad play-acting. They'll pad around in their bare feet swearing at each other - all bleeped out of course, cause the audience's sensibilities are so delicate (you can tell because they're watching a show with Amy Fisher and Joey Buttafuoco). They'll get in fights about leaving the toilet seat up, or forgetting to put the Glock away after taking a pot-shot at the noisy neighbors. Joey will win every argument by finally screaming, "Well at least I didn't shoot my lover's wife in the face and go to prison for seven years!" At which point Amy will run away crying and lock herself in her room. Hopefully, at some point, she will come back out with a shotgun and give Joey both barrels. Come to think of it, I might want to watch that after all.
(by the way - when you run spell-check the program suggests "buttock" for "Buttafuoco." dirty spell-check suggests "butt-fuck.")
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