Keira Knightley has won $6000 in damages from British paper The Daily Mail, after suing them over a story which she claimed suggested she was personally responsible for causing young women to contract anorexia. That story featured a picture of Keira, looking slight as usual, with the headline, "If Pictures Like This One Of Keira Carried A Health Warning, My Darling Daughter Might Have Lived." Hmm...and Keira had a problem with that? I can't imagine why.
Of course, we here at Crabbie's Hollywood never have to worry about running afoul of Keira Knightley. We would never, ever say anything bad about her looks. In fact, we think Keira is just beautiful. And we think it's sad the way she's always running herself down. Why Keira, when you are such an image of perfection? Truly Keira - there is nothing in this world more magnificent than visible rib-cage, long, spindly limbs and sunken cheeks. And you have all of those. And even better - you have no discernible bosom. In fact, if we didn't know you were female, we would think you were a fourteen year old boy. And that's just the way we like you Keira. So don't let those bastards get you down with their talk of anorexia and other mental disorders. They're just jealous. All the women want to be you Keira, and all the men want to fuck you. And all the gays want to dress you up, and clap their hands while you spin and dance and frolic. Wee!
(source)
