Pirates of the Caribbean 3 had its big U.S. premiere at Disneyland in Anaheim last night, and of course star Johnny Depp was there - looking like he'd had a few. But, I don't blame Johnny for getting soused - we all know he's not into the glitzy side of Hollywood, so he probably needs a little alcoholic fortification to get through an evening like that. Anyway, here's another picture of Johnny:
I think Johnny may have started drinking well before the premiere. Like a week before. And he forgot to wash his hair. He runs his hand through it so much - that little self-conscious don't-wanna-be-here move of his - that it's no wonder it looks all greasy. Of course that just adds to his scruffy manly-man allure, right? We like a dude who isn't afraid to go a month without bathing. The natural oils are sexy. And speaking of people who don't bathe often, here's Keith Richards:
Nice skull hankie there Keith. Do you use that to wipe the table off after you're done snorting coke cut with your father's ashes?
And, yes, Orlando Bloom was there too:
Orlando is what Hugh Grant would be if he had not a lick of personality or wit. And speaking of people who have no personality or wit...
Hold on a sec - was Keira Knightley not there? I can't find any pics of her. You mean she skipped the premiere of her movie? What, was she off wandering in the Himalayas again, discovering herself? Oh Keira, you're too good to show up to a goofy Hollywood premiere. It's all so beneath you now. Choke on jizz, Keira.
(yes, I know Keira's filming a movie right now and that's probably why she wasn't there. sometimes we ignore the truth in favor of the bit. those are our priorities here at Crabbie's Hollywood - funny first, truth second. i'm not explaining that again.)
