Now and again one happens upon a piece of news that makes one's very soul shudder with its implications. Well, this is one of those stories. The kind of thing that makes us wonder why God doesn't intervene on behalf of the screwed-up human race or maybe just wipe us all out and start over again with the worms or the mosquitoes or Kevin Federline.And what, exactly, could be so horrible that it would make the very Lord consider taking a personal interest? How about Naomi Campbell wanting to settle down and have kids?
Horror of horrors: the most insufferably cunty woman on the face of the earth (with the possible exception of Nancy Pelosi) is reportedly "desperate" to find a man, co-habitate with or perhaps even marry the poor dope, and become impregnated by him. The problem for Naomi is that...well, I'll let one of Naomi's own "friends" tell it:
Naomi has always had a reputation of being demanding but there are many reasons why she's struggled to settle down. When she became famous, she was allowed to behave like a needy child and had people like Gianni Versace protecting her. Getting older means she has to deal with her issues.
Translation: No man will have Naomi because they all know what a world-class ball-busting bitch she is.
Looks like it's the turkey baster for Naomi. She's in luck though. They're having a sale over at the sperm bank. Demon-seed is 30% off.
