In a move sure to shock and dismay most of the few remaining fans she has, Britney Spears has decided to become a Jew. All right, so maybe I'm kidding. Sort of. Actually, I'm not sure if I'm kidding or not. It all depends on what exactly was going through Britney's mind when she decided to dye her hair black and start wearing a Star-of-David around her neck. Either it was a coincidence - donning the traditional symbol of Judaism and changing her hair-color to the shade most associated with those from a Hebrew background - or else, well, Britney has become a Jew. At least in her own mind. Sort of like Madonna is English in her own mind, and Marilyn Manson is cool in his.Of course, there's more to becoming a Jew than just dyeing your hair and throwing on some jewelry. There's some paper-work you have to fill out, I'm pretty sure, and then there's some kind of ceremony that may or may not involve drinking sheep's blood. And then of course you have to perform that most sacred of all Jewish rituals - going out for Chinese food. I wonder if Britney likes Kung Pao chicken?
Seriously though, it is interesting that Britney, embattled as she is, has suddenly decided to embrace at least partly the Jewish religion. Of course, we all assume this has something to do with her relationship with Isaac Cohen who, amazingly enough given that name, is himself Jewish (but obviously not serious about his show-biz career, otherwise he would've changed it to Ike Caan or Iggy Cooper or something like that). But I think there's more than just the desire to please her man behind this transformation. I think Britney is serious about seeking spiritual solace. I think she's had her eyes opened by her recent troubles, and is looking for something that will help give her strength in this turbulent time. And why not Judaism? It's as good as any other religion, and has the advantage of not being super-strict on a lot of things. Why, even that whole not-eating-pork stuff can be gotten around if you find the right variation to subscribe to. And, as an extra bonus for joining the club, Adam Sandler will likely feature you in one of his wacky satiric songs. Wow, Leonard Nimoy? And the Fonz? Gosh Adam. You sure are clever.
