Hillary Clinton is going to be president of the United States. You can go to Vegas right now and lay down your cash on it. Don't even hesitate. She's got it sewn up.
Pretty confident there, aren't you Crabbie? What, do you have some kind of crystal ball or something? Some power that allows you to see into the future?
Huh. Power to see into the future? What do I need that for? I've got something even better. Yes sir. Something that guarantees beyond a doubt that Hillary will capture the presidency in 2008. I've got Liz Taylor. That's right, old, fat, heinous Liz. She's endorsed Hillary, and that's all the guarantee I need. I don't even have to follow the damn campaign anymore (Barack Obama? Give me a break.). And on election night when Hillary goes up against John McCain, I'll be able to go to bed early, cause I'll already know who won. Yup. Cause you know what they say - As Liz Taylor's endorsement goes, so goes the country.
Or maybe that's, "As Liz Taylor's bowels go, so goes the country." I forget.
