Has Nicole Richie been sporting a slightly fuller figure lately? It seems so. And there appears to be an explanation for this that has nothing to do with healthier eating or less purging: breast implants."Nicole has worked hard to put on some weight, but she also got breast implants from a Beverly Hills plastic surgeon about six weeks ago," a Richie confidant told the National Enquirer. "The effect has been amazing. She looks great and feels great. And her new boobs have given her more confidence than she's ever had before."
So this is Nicole's logic: "I have a terrible self-image. It's gotten so bad that I've begun literally starving myself in an effort to conform to an unrealistic standard of appearance. I know - I'll get fake boobs. Cause that will make me feel better about myself, and help cover up the fact that I now make the aliens from Close Encounters look rotund."
They call it cosmetic surgery for a reason hon - cause it's cosmetic. As in superficial. As in, not having anything to do with the root of the problem, which is not your actual appearance, but the shallow cultural values that have led you behave self-destructively in the first place.
See Nicole, if you weren't so stuck on yourself, and had actual interests in life beyond your own appearance, then you wouldn't be so obsessed with weight. You'd be happy to look however you looked, because you would realize it's not really that important. But you're a narcissistic twit, and that's why you can't deal with what you perceive to be your "flaws." So you must resort to radical measures - starvation, breast augmentation, allowing Rachel Zoe to give you style advice - in order to escape your self-loathing. But it will never work. Because the self-loathing is the result of cultural programming, and the only way to overcome it is to reject the culture that created it. In other words, you have to become a Buddhist. Or Amish. Or maybe get a lobotomy.
This has been another installment of Crabbie the Fixer-Upper.
